My mental health has been great over the past few months. For some reason tonight, I am spinning on the past. Most of it is spinning on my former mentor but there are other things too. It seems I have been very good at dismissing this pointless thought process on individual items. Tonight, they are hitting me all at once. I can't let them all pass by. Test failed.
My success is that I have new facts about old incidents that make them appear in a much clearer light to me. Old Robert would have trotted those out. This Robert understand that people that are in denial tend to stay that way. That and no one really cares about those situations any more but me.
I did try to contact my lesser neschemah. That is the part of the soul that is part of the greater neschemah but not the entire thing. It's function is to connect us with everything else. I started to have 3/4 asleep visions and heard a voice telling me something about things we have to do for ourselves. The visions had to do with bees either entering or leaving me. It was pleasant but the realization scared me awake, I think. Now, I don't fully remember.
More on the Great White Brotherhood and MAP tomorrow.