So, as promised, here is the fun stuff. I have no idea if it is fun for you but it was fun for me.
I went down to Bakersfield to do a psychic fair at the Enchanted Cottage. I did four tarot readings. It wasn't my busiest fair by any stretch but I nailed those readings. Two of the querents bragged about me to another reader. That makes my day! When people say good things to third parties you know you're doing it right and performing a service.
I was also asked to speak before the Bakersfield Pagans regarding what it is like to be a ceremonial magician. I compared and contrasted public neo-Wiccan circles to Golden Dawn initiatory rites. I managed to do this without angering anyone. Given cross-traditional garbage that goes on from time to time, I am giving myself points for pulling that off. The audience too was courteous and seemed to take in what I had to say.
The talk was informal and a bit off the cuff but I think people left with a much greater understanding of both public circles and Golden Dawn type rituals.
I had a rough break up not long ago. I took a lot of crap over a few days that sent me spinning. I have never understood the need to end a loving relationship with mean stuff. I have seen it and done it but not understood it. When I have done it and realized it I have made attempts to make amends. Oddly, I've never seen that done in my direction.
When people criticize me, I take it to heart. I OWN it. I figure anything from someone else's point of view is valid and my point of view may not be. This is insane.
Finally a few things clicked in the other direction and I fired. What I said was factually true and could only be denied if one was unable to admit things. However, it is also really hit home for her. I am a bit ashamed of myself. On the other hand, I feel so much better. So, I guess I know understand that meanness after a break up.
Upon my return Sunday, one of the MM people needed some help. I did a tarot reading and then he asked me for advice on how to do the MM next. I dropped into 'reading' mode without any thought, I read him with great success and provided advice.
I have now offered to do soul readings and healings for my friends in the local community. I will charge for them eventually and would definitely charge for them when I am at the Enchanted Cottage. Right now, it is practicing on friends.
I am not sure if this is where my soul is taking me of it is ego. I will find out. I am doing my first one for a friend later tonight.
When I do the MM, I see my greater neschemah in a particular shape and color. It has changed from red to white of its own accord. I don't see a great deal of change to have caused that, save maybe the soul healing/reading I am now capable of. I do not feel more spiritual.
I do think I have a better understanding of what it is.