Fire of Spirit

Tonight, I skried the tattwas Fire of Spirit. At first, I found the same familiar pattern of dots forming an endless grid of cubes. This time the dots were made of single flames. When I vibrated the god names all became dark. Not knowing what that meant, I exited the space and returned. This time, I was immediately confronted by a column of fire. The grid made up the background.

I asked for a name. It replied. I asked if I could vibrate the god names and gauge its reaction. Upon hearing the three names, it vastly expanded, returned to size but with a green glow at the edges and showed me a small camp fire at its feet. I wanted to go to that location but he would not allow me to move past him. I didn't push the point but that camp fire looked like a wonderful place to be.

I asked him to guide me in this place and to show me how this energy manifested in my life. He told me that this place was too subtle for me to explore. However, I'd be quite at home here. A strange tingling sensation of plasma crawled over my right arm. It said that is how this energy manifests in my life and then told me that my fire can be overwhelming to others. In fact, I scare some people. I'd be surprised at who is fearful of me. It added, "I say this not as compliment or criticism."

He gave me advice on this and on another topic but that is not for posting here.

Frankly, I am not sure what to make of his comments. I know I can be intimidating when I am angry, even though I am about as violent as your average canary, but this is not to what it was referring. Interesting, in a neutral sort of way.

(Image from: http://sharecare.wordpress.com/2007/11/)

Getting Healthy

Long time readers may remember that my HGA told me to lose weight because my weight had a greater effect on my psychology than I understood. I posted regular progress reports but eventually stopped because the purchase of the very expensive thing stomped on the budget and I couldn't go to Weight Watchers to be weighed.

Today, I went to the doctor for a flu shot. I weighed in at 199 pounds! Sixteen less than when I started to eat better and five or six pounds less than I did when I stopped Weight Watchers. Twenty pounds since I was last at the doctor. Apparently, my new eating habits have held and then some! Better yet, my blood pressures has dropped considerably. Previously my systolic pressure was just a point or two above normal and my diastolic could be anywhere from one to twenty points above normal. Today, both were ten points below the upper limits of the range.

In looking back, there has been a tremendous change in my life following a few significant events. The first was listening to my HGA about the weight loss. The second was the invocation of Asmodel. The third was the Saturn ritual that bound my co-worker and the 'clean-up' I had to do as a result. Asmodel gave me a way to actively change my mood at work. I really disliked how frustrated I became there and how I behaved. The diet change took the positive emotional change to a new level. I know because I ate a donut at work and was literally cranky for two days. I can not believe in that all that ritual work, prayer, counseling and everything else came down to simple diet. Ugh! But I'm feeling much better now and easier to get along with at work.

On a related note, my back has been great!

Air of Spirit

Before me the air of spirit tattwas symbol was fixed to the wall. I focused well and entered. I saw the pattern of hanging water drops from the last post. This time, they were crystals. Rapidly, I fell into a current that oscillated like a wave -- up and down up and down but always forward. The wave had a color, orange I think. When I felt that I was riding the wave but going nowhere, I asked for a guide. I heard, "Maybe you are your own guide." This time, I didn't fall for the line. I vibrated Eheieh. My motion stopped but all the crystals in the universe rang at once. I vibrated Metatron and something just as wonderful happened but the 'dream' is fading so fast that I can not remember. I vibrated Chayoth Ha Qadesh and a figure was before me. The spirit was solid and yet not there.

I asked him if he'd mind if I vibrated god names at him to see if he could withstand them. He told me to continue. At the god name, he flew before me and stretched out so far he merged with the universe. At the name of the archangel, he flew from me but only for an instant and then seemed to be forever flying toward me. With the choir name, he stood solid before me.

I asked if it could guide me in this place and tell me how this place reflected in my own life. He said this place was too subtle for someone like me to understand. However, it is manifesting in my life by calming my rampaging mind [at work]. And, he she or it said, "By meditating on spirits of air, I would learn to further calm myself. They would teach me to meditate." The phrase spirits of air kept repeating. I asked, "But this is air of spirit and you refer to spirits of air." He made a sound of understanding my question that was the equivalent of our, "Oh." He then shared that those 'here' 'influence' those 'there'. He said if that if I worked the air tattwas and vibrated his name, he would send the spirits to aid me.

Water of Spirit

I didn't banish because my inner voice told me it wouldn't be necessary. Before me was the water of spirit tattwas symbol. I focussed well and entered. Water hung in the air, literally. Each precise droplet hung in three dimensional space. One could have connected the perfectly formed droplets and made perfectly formed little cubes. Such a thought would never occur to anyone in such a space. I called for a guide but something moving way too fast moved around. I vibrated Ehieh and the droplets became solid crystal. I vibrated Metatron and they rang out like a million tiny chimes in perfect pitch. I vibrated Chayoth Ha-Qedesh and the bottoms of the teardrop crystals turns a pale rose color. I asked for a quide.

The universe birthed a sliver of light that entered my third eye.

I saw a read line among the crystals. This is the pattern I send out, not of water. I then saw a pattern to create. My water. Beautiful.

The guide would give me no name. I could not say the guide was not me.

Hey Me! Get Out of My Way!

Terry Pratchett's book, Thief of Time, has kept me entertained for the day. Even though I am ill, getting lost in this book made me feel magickal. I've noticed this before. I do not mean magickal like your third grade teacher did when she was trying to get you interested in reading. You'll note, I spelled magickal with a 'k'.

Sitting on my couch, I feel the same as when I do group ritual work. That feeling comes from focus. I have a job to do. Nothing, not even my brain will get in my way. Reading a good book results in the same feeling because my brain is not in my way.

There is a deep lesson there for me. If only...

Enochian Plan of the Moment

Last night some interesting things occurred that, despite some difficulties with flu-like symptoms, demonstrated that I have gained a skill. Unfortunately, all is confidential.

I am hacking up a lung as I type. I am amazed at how many small illnesses I've had of late.

My Gal posted an interesting tidbit on our Enochian work beginnings. While I am waiting for some confirmation, I was impressed with her questioning method and what she ran across. We will see if this bears fruit over time.

The general plan for tablet work is to work each native angle of the for each of elemental tablets. Covering all the standard angel/kerub names before moving on to the next tablet. Once we are done all four native angles, we'll work the rest of the subangles for an entire tablet before moving on to the next. Eventually, we'll have evoked every major angel from each tablet. It is a ton of work but if we complete it and the black cross we'll gain a tremendous understanding of our own microcosms.

For those of you that have not been exposed to Enochian magick, there are a couple of standard practices. One involves skrying the thirty aethyrs. That is not what I am discussing. The second is working with the elemental tablets (see air tablet above). The tablets are grids of letters each attributed to an element. With the lettered grids, various angel names can be formed which are then evoked. The grids are further divided into four subangles. The each subangle represents a part of the element. For instance, the four angles on the fire tablet are: fire of fire - the native angle, water of fire, air of fire and earth of fire.

I am not going to enter into a treatise on this complicated form of magick. There are many books on the topic. We are working with Lon DuQuette's Enochian Vision Magick.

Once we gain a level of competency, I'd like to do some group work with some locals and skry the aethyrs.

Air tablet from: http://www.geocities.com/lvx_120/tablets.html

Obsession Recession

For about a week, I've had a hard time with an old obsession. Yesterday as I was walking between office buildings at work, I mentally drew each elemental pentagram 'entered' the portal thus created and asked the angel and asked for help with obsession in a manner appropriate to said element. I made it all the way to now before realizing the obsession was gone.

Preparations

The theme in tonight's work is the tool of the Hierophant, preparations.

I did some confidential tarot work that prepares for other things. Sorry, that is as descriptive as I can get on that one.

My Gal and I worked on our Sigillum De Aemeth together. We each have a blank and entered all the Latin letters around the ring and figured out the names of god therein contained. Next, we drew the appropriate sigils in their proper places. This made me think of all sorts of odd things. For instance, each sigil has what appears to be a letter contained within it. Next to each sigil, is a number. One can find each letter and number combination on the outer wheel save one that has no number. While there does not yet appear to be a link as far as the location of the outer segment with the sigil, this may be a clue to figuring out a more subtle piece of the pie. Once we finish filling everything in this way, we'll redo one using Enochian letters. Then, we carve the wax Sigillum.

We plan on making many photo copies so we can plot various relationships and see what pops up. The first obvious item in this vein is that the sigils are in planetary order of apparent motion.

Tomorrow, we buy bee's wax to make the Tablet of Nalvage.

Fire Dream

I had another important dream last night. There was a fire in an empty school building with an elevator. There was only one enthusiastic fire fighter. He looked at me and hopped into the elevator shaft and rode the pull cables up into the fire. He swung around the shaft like a monkey. He then exclaimed as he was moving onto the fiery floor, "Man, there is a lot of fire around here!" Then he disappeared out of sight.

I later learned that twelve fire fighters had perished fighting the blaze. I was sad when I hear that but thought, "I am not as sad as I should be." My Gal was there in a comforting way.

Frankly, I have no idea what this dream means. I think it is important. I must also note that I've been dealing with other beings, mostly human, in my dreams of late. I don't recall having that much interaction before.

Word Triangles

The other day, I mentioned some incoming information that I judged dubious. I do not think coming across the occasional distrusted spirit is a bad thing. Just like in life, one's endeavors result in all sorts of meetings. If you are friends with everyone you meet, you must be truly blessed or are simply failing to pay attention.

Over the years of my magickal career, I've learned that I can learn from almost anything. Lies are no exception. Truths are hidden in lies. One could look at a truth and a lie as a continuum along the base of a triangle. The apex is the spiritual understanding of the issue. For instance, the last report I had was that due to the way my magick works, I should remain silent when near the Enochian tools we are constructing and that things can manifest quite easily. The lie was in the tone, "Oh Great Magician". The truth? My magick is often spoken into existence. The higher understanding is that this magick may have more wallop than I am used to and therefore greater care should be taken in its design and operation.

Side Note

Last night, I had an important dream. I know I interacted with humans on the dream side but I can't remember now. I did upon waking but the day overtook me too fast. I do know that I did a very good LBRP. I have done parts of the LBRP in dreams but I can't recall remembering a full ritual.

RA Wilson on Crowley's Do What Thou Wilt

I have never been impressed with Robert Anton Wilson's video clips. He never appears as brilliant as many think. However, I like what he says here.

Related Events in Dreams and the 'Mundane'

Last night I had an odd dream. I felt fear, not a mind numbing fear, but one of anticipation of an unpleasant event. Before me was the mouth of a cave, the source of my emotional state. I drew a banishing pentagram of earth large enough to cover the opening. I then made the projection sign towards the cave and held it. A male voice tried to distract me to no avail. Apparently, I tried to banish my fear and then faced it head on. Maybe by 'entering the cave' its reality was able to manifest in a manner I could perceive.

A clown sporting a top hat and a set of nasty fangs emerged and said, "I am a scary clown." Well, thanks for that information. I did not back away but for reasons unexplained reached for his top hat. Shocked, he leaned away. My hand passed through the hat and he scampered off behind me. I turned to see him with My Gal. The scary clown had become a scary baby clown and lay comfortably in her arms. I briefly wondered how she did that.

Briefly, because my thoughts derailed the moment I saw a three foot tall Santa Claus. I asked him if he was indeed the real Santa Claus and he confirmed it. He then went right to My Gal and took her order for Christmas. As he returned from her, I said, "I'd like an open heart and pure perception." He said, "But you already have that," and disappeared into the cave.

I ate lunch in my office today. During the process, I felt something descend upon me that caused that exact feeling of fear from my dream. The sensation was one of having a very elastic material pulled over me. It formed immediately to my body to the chest but did not hinder breathing. My thought at the time was that since I can not astral project, the astral had been pushed down upon me. Maybe I was supposed to push through to the other side? Too late.

A voice said, that I need to be very careful when I pray or even speak when the Enochian tools are around. That my every word matters. That my prayers should be very well thought out as even the idle wish may manifest. I should keep the objects well covered and in a private place. Cover with what? Place them where? With my booming voice they could overhear me in Idaho. I then heard a bunch of stuff along the lines of, "These instructions are not for all but specific to you because of the way your magick works." At that point, my b.s. meter went off. That doesn't sound like flattery when I type it but it sure did when I heard it. Angels are not descending from the heavens to give me props!

I have no idea what this means but the dream and the events at lunch are related. This is the second time I have felt very odd astral sensations since reading Enochian Vision Magick.

Red Ribbon Rant

Today at work we're told to wear pink on Tuesday to bring 'awareness' to the disease of breast cancer. Please. Do the wearers of these ribbons really think putting a decoration on their clothing is going to do one thing stop this disease? Unfortunately, they do. They make themselves feel like they are part of a solution. In reality they are doing nothing.

I first noticed this when I was approached to wear a red ribbon for Drug Abuse Prevention Week. I asked the lady in charge of passing out ribbons if wearing a red ribbon ever got someone off drugs. She said no probably not. I said do you think that a teenager about to shoot up heroin for the first time is going to see some forty something white guy wearing a ribbon and immediately stop what he is doing and run off to college? She said no. So then what is the point of wearing a ribbon? What was the point of even buying the ribbon to give away? Wouldn't society be better served if the money was given to victim/witness program, battered women's shelter or other such cause? She then tried to tell me that wearing a ribbon really did help. Bah!

The only person aided by red ribbon day, blue ribbon week or pink ribbon month is the guy that manufactures the ribbon!

The difference between a magician and the rest of the world is that magicians know that what you do matters. Empty gestures have no value. If you want to make the world a better place, volunteer, give some money or help a little old lady cross the street. Do anything but pin a meaningless ribbon to your chest and convince yourself you've done something worth while because you haven't!

To make this worse, I went in search of a picture of a pink ribbon. I found http://www.carolsutton.net/download_pink-ribbon.html. The site boldly proclaims that this is the first pink ribbon on the internet (see above). I kid you not. The text under that somewhat dubious statement reflects the mentality of people that think this sort of thing has value. I quote, "When I first went in search of a pink ribbon in 1996 to put up on my site there were no copyright free ones available on the web, so I designed my own and a page to go with it and that was the start of the pink ribbon site."

So, let me get this straight. You made the first pink ribbon on the internet because the other pink ribbons on the internet were copyrighted. Gotcha. You go with that if you have to.

None of Your Bee's Wax! It's Ours.

My Gal and I are working on this Enochian thing together. Today, she found some old bee's wax and we melted it down into a nine inch baking tin. She was smart enough to put the oven on a low temp as to not volatilize the material. Just about the time it was to finish melting, I heard a call to prayer. I listened.

I went to my temple and prayed to the powers of creation and to those that created the Enochian current to bless our puddle of wax that would soon be our Sigillum De Aemeth. My prayers were interrupted by guests arriving. We chatted for a bit and then I was rude. Completely ignoring the conversation, I walked over to the wax and found it to be in a completely liquid state. I held my hands to either side of the tin and prayed again. Normally, when praying like that energy will move from one hand to the other. This time the energy emerged from my throat chakra. I could feel the power and flashed back to when a friend showed me how to make holy water in her witchy way a million years ago. She had done the same thing.

When I opened my eyes, it was obvious the wax was cooling. The wax solidified around the edges, which I would expect. The solidification also occurred in tiny dots all through the center of the wax. Some of the solidified portion was actually within the wax with liquid wax on top. I thought that interesting and went back to the conversation.

Upon returning to the now solid piece, the wave of the energy pattern is obvious. Although a liquid should be flat and should solidify flat, the top of the disk has peaks and valleys. My Gal says wax does not cool that way normally.

I have no idea what the physics of cooling beeswax are. This could be normal or not. I have no idea. I am just recording like I always do. I am sure someone out there will let me know if cooling bee's wax usually does so flat or with ripples on the top.

Active Listening

Listening is more than taking notes just like magick is more than reading ancient texts. For the listening to matter, we must act. In doing so, we just act with prudence and discernment.

The other day, I was 'told' by something to focus on a ensign from the Enochian table of practice to learn to astral project. Maybe. I made a note of it. Not long ago, I was 'told' by the Tribe of Dan to meditate on a given tarot card. No. The tribe was unruly and I didn't do that ritual properly. I'd have to hear that same instruction from another source before considering following that advice.

Longer ago, I was told to eat more fruit. I did so and didn't notice much of anything. Later, my HGA told me to loose weight because it affected my psychology more than I know. I listened again and he was right. I am much calmer at work and feel better.

I was told by one of the spirits of the book known as Goetia to organize my business affairs better and I wouldn't be on the downside of so many bad companies. Even though my record keeping wasn't the issue, I figured it couldn't hurt. I have done so. So far, so good. I haven't encountered much negativity in that realm recently.

Sometimes the standard is reasonableness. Other times, instinct. You can ask the spirits for lots of information. To not act on it at all is pointless and a waste of their efforts. Frankly, it is disrespectful. To act on everything is just plain foolish and not in a good way. Listen and act but do so carefully.

Ensign of Creation

I took some Jacuzzi time today. As it sat in my favorite spot, I immediately felt a pull. I became so dizzy that my hands instinctively grabbed my chair. I saw the Enochian Vision Magick book. I saw one of the shapes but it was only the barest outline. I 'hear' that it is my answer. That I should focus on that seal. I try to see more but it is not much more than a triangle. Yet, I knew the group from which this came. I am told that this is the answer to my astral projection issue and then some laughter. It seems that I asked the first of my goetic spirits about this and he finally found a way to communicate the answer.

The Enochian ensigns are the seven talismans that sit on the table. There is one for each planet. This particular ensign relates to Bobogel and Befafes, respectively, king and prince of the Sol. I barely glanced at the images as I read and certainly did not equate this image with Sol, planet of Leo. At the very least this is a testimony to how much the subconscious picks up when reading something.

Dumbing Down the Modern Magician

In reading Enochian Vision Magick by Duquette, I was struck by the incredible complexity of the system. I have no idea how many hours Dee and Kelly spent skrying, writing and performing the mental gymnastics necessary to bring it forth. Since then many very dry technical books have been written on the topic. The few I read or more to the point, tried to read, did not inspire me to turn the pages much less do the magick. Then Lon Milo appears on the scene. Lon must have spent uncountable hours studying and working the system before putting out this incredibly easy to understand work.

As I contemplated this, I wondered about the Dumbing Down of America. If you think we are as educated as our recent ancestors, you're more uneducated tha I am. As proof, I offer Ken Burn's documentary on the Civil War. Just listening to the letters and diary entries from common soldiers tells me that they had a much deeper understanding of the language and word smithing than the above average American today.

Dumbed down is likely the refrain you'll hear from scholars. There are magickal scholars of two types. Those that study magick, and those that study and do magick. If you read Lon's book, you will not being able to compete with either category of Enochian scholar. If you read Lon's book, you will not be able to compete with even those that do Enochian magick. Lon's book is a starting point for those that want to do Enochian. Let the scholarship follow the Work, if that is your Will.

You can learn Enochian through the Sloan documents and the rest of the writings housed in the British Museum as well as your local search engine. I've tried to perform the mind bending gyrations necessary to understand those sources in the past. Frankly, I am not that smart and, like Lon, lazy.

So, in reading Lon's book, I began to think this is cheating. Enochian is vast, complex and hard to understand and it should be! This is easy. Then again, so is the magick I do now that I used to think was so hard.

The book is simple, easy to read and very informative. I don't feel like I need a scholar's mind, nor the time available only to the idle rich to digest the material. Lon has taken all the thinking out of magick! No. He's taken all the work out magick! No. He's done it all for me! No. He has simply made it accessible to the non-scholar. That isn't dumbing down at all. That is distilling. It is creating a foundation for those that want to do. One doesn't need to know the year Dee and Kelley met nor understand the English of the period to do the magick.

Doing Magick is about doing magick. It is the doing that matters.

I've long been fascinated by the Sigillum Dei Aemeth (above). After reading less than twenty-two pages, I understand. I get it and I am even more fascinated by the prospect of making my own. In the style of a master teacher and a Master of the Word, he takes the reader to the threshold of the divine and lets aspirant make a choice to step through.

My actual praise for this work is much greater than I am relating here. However, I am only 78 pages into it and I haven't done anything yet with the material. At first blush I am mightily impressed. Bravo.

(Sigillum image from www.hermetic.com/.../images/Crystal_Ameth.gif)

Serving in Life

Today is Boss's Day. I am on the other side of that issue. I do not believe my staff should spend their hard earned money to buy a card, gift or even lunch for me just because Hallmark paid off a group of politicians in some back room capitalistic orgy.

So, I bought my staff lunch.

There are some magical traditions that hold the student should serve those higher up on the food chain. In my tradition, those a chapter or two ahead serve the younger. When you are younger, it may not look or feel like that is what is happening. Truth be told, it doesn't happen all the time. Humans are human but the goal of serving is always there.

This is the attitude I have with my staff. My job is to make it possible for them to do their job with as little grief as necessary. My job is to clear the way. My job is to save enough money in harsh budget times that we can avoid laying someone off. My job is to serve them, even if that means kicking their butts when necessary. Sometimes be served doesn't look like we want it to.

This too is magick. Sometimes, the lessons don't come packaged in a manner suited to our preference. The trick is to learn the lessons anyway. The trick is to work out the magick like proofs in geometry. The trick is to keep Working.

(picture from http://www.omahaballoon.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/.pond/86210.jpg.w300h313.jpg)

Why Do Magick?

Last night I posted that I'd be back in my temple tonight. I am not going because I am tired and I don't want to. Instead, I am reading DuQuette's latest work, Enochian Vision Magick. I offer a bit of his writing because I liked it. This is from the book's second prologue. Yes, in typical DuQuette fashion, his book as a prologue to the prologue and a prologue.

"On the surface one might think it is reasonable and fair to ask, "Why are you a magician, Lon? Why do you believe in this stuff? Why do you do these crazy things?"

It might surprised you to know I don't have a proper answer to these questions. It is impossible for me to adequately explain or justify why I celebrate my spiritual life through the vehicle of magick, for the same reasons, it is impossible for any artist to properly explain why he or she has taken up the brush or the chisel or the violin or ballet slippers. If reasonableness were the sole criterion for the existence of art, there would be no music, no dance, no magick.

Make no mistake about it, magick is an art form, and every true magician is an artist. Just like the musician and dancer, the magician must practice, create, and perform. Just like the painter or sculptor, he or she must be armed with proper tools, skills, knowledge, and, most of all, inspiration. ...

As quantum physicists tell us, both the observer and that which is observed are changed by the act of observation itself. By appreciating the artist's handiwork, we are fundamentally affecting the reality and life of that creation. More importantly, when we expose ourselves to the artist's creation, we enjoy the passive luxury of allowing our consciousness to be altered, elevated, and enriched in unique and personal ways the artist might have never imagined.

The art of ceremonial magick, however, is a bit different. There are no painted canvas to display, no audience to applaud. Regardless of how altruistic the magician's motives my be, magick is spiritual performance art that must ultimately be executed and appreciated by the magician alone. He or she is at once the teacher, the student, the medium, the conductor, the performer, the venue, the audience, and the critic. The magician touches the broader audience of humanity only by affecting changes in the magician, and success can be weighted only in the silent Holy of Holies of his or her own soul.

Tomorrow, I Start Again

Well, my boys in blue lost and looked bad doing it. I will be back in the temple tomorrow!

Being Aware

I made this post just a few days ago. In it, I included a few words about living by your truth. As usual, my friend Joe completely outclassed me with his writing style while covering close to the same thing. Anyone reading this blog that isn't reading his blog is really missing out. Check out what he had to say here.

A Clean Temple is a Loud Temple

So, this weekend, I decide to clean my carpets. My brother-in-law is kind enough to not only do the work for me but he footed the bill for the rental. I insisted on cleaning carpets in my temple space for what I hope are obvious reasons. The work resulted in severe back pain. Even though I've been much better lately, I simply get into denial and decide that I can do something I really shouldn't.

Today, I walked into the temple space just to feel the energy. I perceive the energy to be actively peaceful. The feeling was much the same except someone turned the volume up. The difference was not subtle. The room pulsated with life.

I asked my HGA what happened. He said, it has been this way for a while; I am just now sensitive enough to feel it. Since yesterday? I don't think so. I asked if the increase in energy had to do with the carpet cleaning. Yes. He explained that what resides here resides on the astral and if I clean here, I clean there. I suppose something was clogging up the energy because it certainly is flowing now!

Yesterday, I had My Gal drive me to Kinko's to copy the kameas out of John Michael Greer's Circles of Power. I copied them onto appropriately colored paper. Frankly, I had a very general spiritual idea of what do with them and a concrete mundane reason for Luna, Mercury and Venus. I shared the latter with RO and he suggested conjuring them all at once.

My HGA's response to the entire thing was to simply conjure the spirits using the Kamea and tell them that you seek to understand the nature of the astral elements. Cabalists have a different name for elements depending upon their placement on the tree. The names are primordial, primal, specific, maternal, transitional, astral and base. The astral elements are those on the lower sephira of the tree of life; Air (Yesod), Water (Hod) and Fire (Netzach). Planetarily that is Luna, Mercury and Venus. He said that I can do them separately or all at once but if I do the latter that I better have the tech right. That sounded like a warning to me.

So, I will listen to said advice and see what happens.

Personal News and Free Advice

Personal News

I was very pleased to hear something today.

I've never spent much on gifts for my niece and nephew for the simple reason that they have anything they'd ever need. Another twenty or thirty dollars would never make any real difference in their lives. Yet, every gift I have given has been because I love them.

Last holiday season, I spent a small fortune on occult/pagan books as a gift to my nephew. I received recommendations from friends, from the Great Work yahoo group and John Michael Greer. My nephew isn't into the occult. He may not even believe magick is possible. The books were given without any intent to convert him away from his Catholic faith. My intent was to broaden horizons and thus strengthen his faith. His parents have done a very good job of exposing him to many different religions. I was just adding one more. In my opinion, there was a very good chance of those books sitting on the shelf unread.

Today, he came home from working at a Catholic camp as a counselor for people barely younger than himself. The camp was a pre-Confirmation workshop. He thanked me for the books because they helped him help others with their faith. I was thrilled to hear that. That love and money were well spent!

Free Advice to Seekers

Listen to your HGA even when you haven't found him yet. Listen hard. Willfully listen.

Near Future

I have serious plans to delve into some Tattwas and Enochian work. These notes will be forthcoming. However, after a year without a TV, I am taking some time out to watch my favorite baseball team in the playoffs. Go Blue!

The Damage Teachers Do

And the brilliance that results...

Thaumaturgy

For most of my magickal career, I have railed against thaumaturgy.

I had my reasons. The first was out of a sense of responsibility. Once you've done a few acts of magick, you realize how quickly and deeply other people are affected when one pulls upon the strings of the universal web. Great intellectual capacity is not necessary to conclude that magick done to get one a job that was otherwise unobtainable must cost someone else the same opportunity. My belief was that I should compete for such things on an even level.

Bullshit.

Some people are smarter than others. Some people had parents that made going to college easy. Other people had parents that made it hard or impossible. Some people are really good looking and therefore have an advantage only because they happen to be a genetic lottery winner. If my advantage is that I worked my ass off to learn magick, then there is no reason that I should not put those skills to use in my favor. Though, it does seem logical that if that counts as a 'skill' in getting a job, I'd have to use that skill in doing the job. I am still working that part out.

My second reason was one of respect. Given that most people have no conscious protection against magick, influencing someone to do something they would otherwise not have done seems less than ethical. For instance, let’s say a magician/witch wants to get to know a girl, but knows that someone she likes will be at the same party. Is there any difference between magickally influencing him not to be there and going to his house and letting all the air out of his tires? If the latter is a violation of his personal property the former is certainly a violation of his personal sovereignty.

My Gal gave a talk on Crowley recently and she pointed out what he said about taking away the rights of others. Doing so, he said, is magickally declaring that those rights do not exist. Therefore, they no longer exist for the magician in question. So, if I take away his 'right' to attend the party, what does that cost me as far as my personal sovereignty? I have no idea, probably nothing. However, those little things we do that go against our conscience add up and sooner or later detract from our self-image and our general enjoyment of our own company.

While I have rejected my first reason, the second still holds water for me as an ethical violation. I don't want anyone letting the air out of my tires. Therefore, I will not let the air out of yours.

I bring this up now because I watched demons dance last night. After I posted, another song came on that I liked and I saw the second of my boys dancing with Bune. The fellow is not much of a dancer but when joined by Bune they became Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire.

After watching them, I understood a little about how demons work their mojo but that will be a topic of another post.

The bad thing was that I was fascinated by the dance. I was focused but not quite at the level of giving up my mind and zoning out. As arrogant as this might sound, a lesser mind or a lesser trained magician could have. Is that dangerous when dealing with spirits of the book known as the Lesser Key? I am not sure but I think so. There was a definite call to 'play' with the 'earth' to immerse myself in the powers I now possess ─ tempting but no.

While I am a firm believer that a good magician has his head in heaven and his feet in hell, I am not going to stoop down into the that darkly splendid world wherein continually lieth a faithless depth and Hades wrapped in gloom, delighting in unintelligible images, precipitious winding, a black ever-rolling Abyss, ever espousing a body unluminous, formless and void.1

So, my test may be applying my new conclusion that I have a right to work magick in the real world while avoiding becoming a void.

A Little Dance

Well, one of the 'boys' did something nice for My Gal today. She told them she'd play a little rock and roll tonight. One of them really likes heavy metal. Who knew the Evangelicals were actually right on that one? Anyway, his favorite song came on which really makes sense if you know the spirit and the song. Sometimes no critical thinking is necessary. So, I cranked it up and literally watched him dance. He isn't a great dancer but he sure does have fun.

I am planning some tattwas skrying soon.

Passing

I did a very brief private thing for the passing of a friend's spouse.

A Spiritual Coat of Arms

I used to work with a woman of little education. She maintained a deep simple faith. I always admired that but for some reason never told her so. When she got mad at someone she'd always say, "That woman almost made me put down my religion!" In short, she almost set her beliefs aside to take care of some business ghetto style.

Last night, my HGA told me to wear the very expensive thing, i.e. a custom made gold signet ring from this place, while at home but not to wear it when I left. I followed said instructions. I took the ring off and went to leave for work this morning. I didn't like the idea at all and that was the point.

He said, "It is very easy to deny yourself just as it is easy to take off that symbol." He was right. Turning towards this relationship took a lot of work. Turning away could be simple. I read a trite statement on the back of a T-shirt the other day, "Character is what you do when no one is looking." Yup. I won't be taking off this ring anytime soon.

This isn't about the character some moralist would care about. This is about living in one straight line. This is about moving up the middle pillar. This is about actively living with soul. My soul.

What My HGA Said When I Finally Listened

Immediately upon entering my temple space, I heard, "Wear it." I said, "I will banish and then I will consider it if I hear those words again." I wanted to make sure an improper banishing hadn't left behind a remnant of something in my temple space.

So, I banished wearing my HGA lamen. During the banishing I understood that my mistake was focusing on the consecration. I have the item because I listened and that is what the object symbolizes, listening and communicating with my HGA. Afterwards, I asked him what to do about the object. "Wear it but only do so about your home. Take it off when you leave your premises." Why? The basic answer to that was because he said so but it wasn't really a command or a parental thing. It was obvious that I had a choice and could choose otherwise. I asked if I would eventually consecrate the item. He said I would and I think soon. For right now, I am wearing the very expensive thing. I love it and I am fascinated by it.

Consecration and...

Consecration

As promised, here is a bit on the consecration of the very expensive thing. I stopped. Of course, there is more to it than that.

I posted about an embarrassingly ill planned ritual here. During the preliminaries things felt wrong but, like the undauntable Leo that I am, I persevered nearly over a cliff. Fortunately, Osiris arrived and saved my amateur self. The rest of me arrived to learn the lesson.

So, in going through the consecration rite. Something felt amiss on the first day. Then again on the second day. The second day commenced Binah work. Binah is Saturn. Saturn is restriction. I stopped.

In both cases the cause was the same. I've been so confident in hearing my HGA that I proceeded as if my thoughts were echoing his. They weren't. This caused my demise. So, I've been listening again to my HGA. In fact, it was my HGA that reminded me of the Tao spell from yesterday's post.

Tonight, I will ask my HGA how to proceed with the consecration.

Miscellaneous Stuff

What is the very expensive thing?

Frater RO sent me a link to a site that contained a rant about occult bloggers that get cryptic. Talk about it all or don't at all was the message. RO thought the rant was about my blog and the very expensive thing. I can understand wanting to know what the expensive thing is but focusing on that is to ignore the true import of those posts. Focusing on the object is a self-created blind. If that sounds arrogant or is arrogant, so be it.

Diet

I haven't had a chance to weigh in since a week ago Saturday. At that time, I found myself back losing weight after a bout of zeros and a very small gain. I dropped 1.2 pounds. Since then, I've lost my second notch on my belt which means I must have lost even more.

Tao Spell

Frater RO asked in the comment section to yesterday's post if I could share more about the Tao spell. The answer is yes and no. I can tell you about my technology. However, there is a secret. That secret is the tech that WitchDoctorJoe taught me. He asked me to keep it between us and I will honor that.

Basically, I did a the LBRP, BRH and middle pillar, four vibrations per sephira.

Then I visualized Privithi a tattwas of earth. I stated my will to charge the astral form to help me live within the Tao of my work place. This was followed by four vibrations each of the god name, archangelic name and choir name of Malkuth. I watched the form change shape into how it exists today.

The rest of the tech is confidential.

You may ask if I think that spell helped in my promotion. My answer would be, I have no idea.

Some Magick in Mundane Life

It seems like life has gotten busy. I have moved from planning for PPD and attending the event to having a bad back day to taking My Gal to the County Fair tonight.

The only thing I really like about the fair is the art exhibit. This year I was relatively unimpressed. I found some talented artists but nothing spoke to me until I was awestruck by a painting of Indians in what must have been the Arizona desert. Everything from the swirling clouds and circling hawks, to the men on horseback to the desert catci made me shiver with delight. I am not much for Western art but had six grand been in my pocket they would have had to hang a sold sign. I find it special to be struck by a piece of art when the genre is normally out of my sphere of taste.

One magickal bit did occur. I lost My Gal in the art exhibit. There are no straight lines of sight in the Fine Arts Building. I found her psychically and walked straight to her. Normally, that is not one of my skills but I tried a new technique for me and I was able to accomplish the task. That may have to do with the Tribe of Dan.

Friday, I saw my new boss. I asked my HGA how to handle the situation because I've never met the man before. My HGA reminded me of a spell I did a while back. WitchDoctorJoe taught me one of his techniques and I adapted to what I do. The spell involved getting into the Tao of work. I remembered the triggers and used them. Instantly the forgotten visual came into being before me. The meeting went very well. I like that spell because it helps me to find the flow of what is already happening and step into it. There is no need to influence anyone but myself yet I get what I need. In this case, we both got what we needed, which made the act so much more satisfying.

The odd thing is that I want to magick to do a lot of things. I want more spells like the Tao spell. I want more things to work as well as the Asmodel experience. I want to literally explode into a better magician. Three years ago, if you told me that today I could do what I do now, I'd be thrilled. Today, I am dissatisfied. I want to expand magickally. I want to walk through the next door.

Tomorrow, I will post something about the consecration of the very expensive thing.

(Picture from: http://www.mcagfair.com/)

Fresno's Pagan Pride Day

Some time has passed since my last post and a few of my last posts didn’t say much. I was really involved in preparing my Pagan Pride Day speech. The blurb for the speech was:

The Magick of the Self - Your Journey to Your Holy Guardian Angel

The pagan magickal world has many tools to choose from. All of these
tools are effective for what they are designed to do. They are even
more effective when you use them to do what you are supposed to do and
they only way to determine that is to learn from your spirit, daimon
or angel more popularly known as your Holy Guardian Angel. Discover
the how to take the most personal journey -- your path to divinity.

I wasn’t as polished as I’d like to be but I think it went quite well. The best part was basically a download from Asmodel, the angel of Taurus.

This year a couple of interesting things occurred.

First, a person I call friend was kind polite and friendly but I could literally feel the fact that this person wasn’t really happy having contact with me. In years past, that really would have been an internal problem for me. I would have said “I don’t care,” but deep down, I would have really cared. This time, I am fine with it. I hope this person’s feeling change because I do have a fondness but if it doesn’t that is okay. I have no need to control the universe. Frankly, I find it very cool to be okay with it.

Secondly, I watched a witch do magick and the weather changed. It was really cool! Frankly, I couldn’t feel a thing. I simply know this person well enough to know when s/he is working or at least I have a clue. I also listened to the way s/he didn’t answer someone’s question in the process of working. The magick was so gentle that a Leo like myself that understands only brute force be it active or passive could only sit back and be impressed. Oh to be subtle. That may be a dream for my next life.

Just a Note

I've had many thoughts on the ritual of Dan mentioned a day or so ago. However, tonight I am diligently working on my Pagan Pride Day speech. I figure that if people are going to give me their time, I ought to do the best I can do.

I will be doing day two of the consecration but am unlikely to post about it today.