Sunday, September 30, 2012

Response to Jack

My friend Jack responded to some of my recent posts here. Read that first if you like, even though I extensively quoted here. 

Jack: This is one of those risky examples of counter-points to magickal utility that I've seen expressed by others; the first is that if any one at all has their course in life changed, or there is fall-out, the magician is principally at fault. 

As the primary infuser of the energy of change into a relatively static situation, he is certainly not irresponsible...oh wait. 

Jack: He goes on to state that many younger magicians fall prey to their “lower selves”. I consider this a dangerous example of dualistic thinking, for it presumes to understand the nature of magickal work and break everything into a “Good/Evil” dichotomy, a mind-virus that individuals in the West have a tendency to suffer from.

Allow me to back this up a bit. My presumption is that the people impacted believe in that dualistic world view. Why? Because most people do. They will perceive events in their life as good/bad. No matter how much they later grow spiritually, someone's death, job loss, bad date, etc. will be dealt with as a negative. The people so impacted will feel pain. To sit back and say well, they only feel pain because of their dualistic perceptions, while true, is lacking in compassion. 

Secondly, almost all magick assumes the good/bad paradigm. Otherwise, you wouldn't be trying to obtain anything by magick aside from that which covers your basic needs of food and shelter. It is good to have a wife and bad not to, at least that is the judgement Jack made doing the magick he admits to performing. Therefore, claiming those wounded in the fallout should adopt a non-dualistic world view is a bit philosophical rationalization.

Personally, I honestly believe and know that everything is perfect/nothing matters (non-dualistic...I think) but if you step on my toe, it will hurt and I will say, "Ouch." If you drop a sledge hammer on my toe, I will say, "$(@$)_ ouch!" Healing time will be longer too. Even if I met a new friend in the hospital that enriches my life, I am still going to be upset with you for your negligence. Twice as upset if you knew better and didn't care about me enough to stop. Three times as upset if you deny you dropped the hammer. 

Should you do that in a variety of circumstances to a variety of people, I will stand against you until I believe you have grown into something more in alignment with the principals I expect my associates to hold. It is fine if you disagree and behave differently, I just ask that you hold them over there...preferably in another state.

Frankly, as scary as Jack likes to think he is, he's a hell of a nice guy. If he ever dropped a hammer on my toe, I'd assume it slipped. I'd also expect him to buy me a New Castle. Why, because if Jack dropped a hammer on my toe, he wouldn't deny it. My response would be, "You owe me a New Castle."

First, Robert appears to be making the mistaken assumption that the young magician being led around by the nose by their “lower-self” will not be lead into circumstances that lead them to knowledge and conversation with aspects of their “higher-self.” 

No. Before I get there, let me say that old magicians can be lead by the nose by their lower selves. See my posts about my Nephesch taking over when I thought I could use it instead of it using me. Mistake! I was thoroughly led by the nose for a day or two after.

Mistakes are essential to learning. Any magician that wants to be lead to his higher self will find that path regardless of type of magick practiced or other intent, unless he gets caught in the glamour of his own magick or creates such a disaster s/he walks away from the entire process. The problem is that many, while saying they do seek the so-called higher, have no real intent to grow whatsoever. Growth tends to be more a factor of maturity than effort and while positive, not fully effective. Normally, this silly stuff is about power. Which segues nicely into his next line.


Secondarily, he's following the prototypical “it's all power!” assessment that bothers me very much. He assumes that if the magician uses “Get Laid Quick!” sigils, they'll be using it a means of power over someone else, or neglecting a desire for love. As I stated in my responses to his Sitri post, I see nothing wrong with using magick to engineer circumstances in which sex might occur. What I consider wrong is mistaking sex for love, or the desire for sex as a mistaken desire for love. If we stand by the admonition of “Know Thyself!” then we must also understood the root of our desires.

I am pretty sure we agree on everything here, except his assumption on what I assume. My objection in the Sitri post was more along these lines. If you call a beast like that seeking sex but your psychology is really looking for love or acceptance, you are in a world of hurt or will be. I stand by that. 

Jack: To tell someone that they must seek love over sex, or vice versa, is a fatal conceit. It presumes to know the desire, path, and capability of any given young magician. It is a very foolish thing to do, even if people do hurt themselves.

I never meant to imply such.  In fact, I think I cleared that up in a response to Jack earlier.

Jack: Part of living this world is learning to live with the hurtful things that happen in it. Any system of magick, spirituality, or mysticism that seeks to diminish this factor is also foolish, for we cannot live without pain. 

True: But I don't think it is our right as magicians to randomly cause pain that facilitates someone else learning that lesson. We have no idea who is ready for that lesson. To cause pain and simply say, "their fault, they don't know," demonstrates a lack of compassion and is devoid of personal responsibility.

False: As I am seeing with the MM, the lessons learned are much less painful than initiatory system while being just as effective. I did not seek that but that is what it appears to be. I am still collecting data so that may change.

Jack: First,assuming you can see all the given variables in any situation is wrong-headed. Even if that single-mother may end up without what may be the first, and easiest to seek out job, is to assume she will not within a week apply for a job that pays more money and gives her what she needs. Second, as Jason points out in his comments, you can specify not to harm others. I cannot speak for others, but almost all of my work for material items involves divination beforehand, and careful consideration of the results. I have passed over many-a-working because I drew the “Tower” card in an particularly inauspicious position, with similarly terrible cards arranged around it. My perspective has always been that “we all go to the Tower, some more than others!” but that doesn't mean I prefer to avoid intensely messy situations. Included in plenty of those divination performances were questions regarding how those around me or involved may be impacted by my actions. 

First, Jack is arguing that since we don't know if she'll get a better job than the one I take from her, taking it is just fine. By this logic, I can break into a home and steal the TV because I guess maybe possibly that they can get a better one with insurance, if they have coverage. In the woman's case, I sure hope she can feed her kids for that week or can keep the phone on so she gets that job offer.

That said, I fully recognize the reality that anyone that gets the job takes it from another that needs the job. Yes, this belies my argument. There is a third thing...I will let Jack figure out what I mean. 

Secondly, Jack is essentially conceding he does things to avoid the concerns I have while debunking said concerns. He is arguing what ought to be and then planning for the reality of what is. As long as he plans for reality. I am good. 

Jack: I have also made plenty of mistakes by failing to perform the above, normally due to my own personal conceits. Like I've said, you cannot learn without making mistakes. And sometimes those mistakes hurt both you and those who you did not wish to hurt.

Once again, Jack is arguing my point. Thanks for the help.

Jack: If you wish to perform Theurgia and seek your higher-self, and those spirits that coincide with it? I totally recommend doing that. However I do not think you have the right to suggest that course of action is best for everyone. It may be best for you, because that is your path I like plenty of Cthonic gods. Lots of people have no idea what I mean when I speak those words. That's okay.

This is one of Jack's fatal traps. He assume that a theurgist making these points is trying to argue that the way of theurgy is the only way. This is silly. In fact, I so indicated in my posts that this is not so, albeit not directly. So, I will now. Any other magickal path is valid and acceptable in my book. The fact that I have an opinion does not mean I devalue your path. It means that I have an opinion. My opinion is that some magickal practices and errors can harm others, as well as the magician, an opinion, Jack agrees with, at least from how interpret his post.

Jack: What,you can't gain the skills to stop that process or recognize what's happening? Just a suggestion: if this happens, then you need to increase your skill set to recognize manifestations for what they are and put a stop, as the person whose Will is being impact before that situation arises. You cannot blame someone for a manifestation that you failed to take into account. You could have spent time learning those skills, rather than simply doing soul-work. I don't accept ignorance as an excuse, rather ignorance is a teaching tool and demonstration on how to become a better magician, in my eyes. 

This is where Jack just got silly. Oh, that mugger hit you over the head and stole your grandmother's ring? Well, that is your fault isn't it? Had you just learned karate...

He also is assuming a few things.

The first is that the magician and the Person B are of relatively equal skill set making this attempted or accidental theft somehow acceptable. He is essentially saying, yeah, that person I mugged, no problem, she knew jujutsu. So, it is totally okay if I sneaked up and blindsided her, totally fair play.

As someone that has the wears a cringing chicken as a sign of my combat skills, I have chosen a life devoid of violence. That makes me vulnerable to thugs. It will suck if I get hit over the head and have my wallet stolen. It sucks even worse to live in such fear to make preparations for that. My life path is too busy with things I value more than catering to my fear of attack. 

Secondly, he is assuming anyone else in the equation even knows what magick is. No. All this poor man knows is his wife left him, his kids won't speak to him and alcohol takes the pain away. That's okay though right? After all, he needs to learn pain is an illusion. This dualistic thinking is his problem.

Jack: Please: feel free to critique my thoughts!

I will get right on that. 

Let it be known I love Jack. He is self-admittedly insane, a damn fine magician and has more mental faculties hungover than I sober. Jack has taught me stuff that has nothing to do directly with magick. He also owes me $5.00 for a pack of cigarettes I bought him five years ago. That said, we will mostly always have this discussion in some form or another. There is no animosity on either side.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Magicians Accept No Blame

This is  follow-up to the post, Should Magick Be Taught?

I have encountered all sorts of people that have accepted that their magick worked, a few that said their magick had gone wrong, but aside from myself, I have never heard a magician, witch or other practitioner say that s/he hurt someone with magick accidentally, due to negligence, the fates or something else. I have seen people even deny the possibility that their magick could have possibly impacted a third party negatively. This disturbs me.

How is it possible that only magick is devoid of the possibility of error, negative impact and even accidental death when industries like automobile manufacturers, construction companies and the medical establishment cannot manage the same? Oh, no, I see, it is only your magick that can't hurt anyone. Really?

If I negligently drive an automobile and hit a child, people would blame me. I would blame me. Yet, if I saw a dangerous intersection that the city wouldn't fix and I did magick to inspire them to do so and that magick caused a fatal accident and that accident inspired the change, most magick users would say I probably wasn't responsible. It would have happened anyway. If it was their magick, it definitely would have happened anyway.

Why?

Because you really can't see magick working. It isn't as if you see a giant hand pluck the kid from a safe place and stick in him in the road to be hit. No way to tell really, is there?

Then how is it we can tell when our magick worked? Hmmm? We take all of the credit and none of the responsibility.

I see three problems here.

1. The universe we are working in is too big. Magick flows down the channel of least resistance like water running behind a wall in your bathroom. You may never see it until the damage is done. The difference is you can't deny the water caused the damage. The possible paths of magickal flow is really too big trace cause and effect reliably. In short, no one really sees magick work The giant hand never appears. This allows for plausible deniability. It doesn't sound any better for us than politicians does it?

2. Given the nature of humans, we take credit for what works, and live in denial about the rest. To me, denial is by far the worst trait of the magician bar none. You cannot grow spirituality or as a practitioner if you are in denial about what you have done.

3. A fundamental belief that magick flows where it ought to and thus any result is right and just. There are spiritual truths, thereby, to be gained. I can't argue with this. I can simply place in it another context. No one says that man cheating on his spouse is ok because, well, there are spiritual lessons to be learned from the situation, even though there are spiritual lessons for all involved. Is an act that harms another acceptable because of medium of action?

I have no conclusions to this one either. I am just pointing something out.

Upcoming Work on the Paths with a Twist

As previously stated, I am going to walk some paths along the tree of life during this dark time of the year. This is ambitious but this is my plan. I feel I am ready.

If not, I may blow up. If I am, I may blow up anyway. This stuff is pretty far up the tree only a completely arrogant wanker says, "Oh this will be a cake walk."

I plan to walk the following paths as I did a year or so ago with others:

The Hanged Man
Justice 
Wheel of Fortune 
Hermit 
Strength 

Stay tuned for high drama or low drama. In this case I will be blogging technique. So, it will be more like the Old Robert blog than the more contemporary stuff you've been reading.

There have been some changes in my philosophy and life that I will be accounting for. 

Philosophically, I am getting less and less sure of the idea that overcoming barriers is necessary. Many feel that the trials are important for self-realization. They look at the work like a spiritual obstacle course. Climbing on the rope may build the arm strength needed in order to hop over it again. However, if you fully actualize the work, you will not face that wall again. So the point of arm strength is what exactly?

I began to have doubts watching people do the MM and seeing them overcome things with a minimum of trauma. Here is a case in point that started before I did healing work and before she started the MM. Given that, I am going to do this work fully expecting to hit horrendous blocks that would normally result in big time trauma from which I'd heal, gain realizations and continue on. 

However, this fellow by the name of Augustine Burrows points out in his work that there are some traumas form which you never recover. For me, it was the very bad thing. There have been  few others that I don't whine about much (imagine that). 

Also I believe all suffering is to teach us that nothing matters. I think this is why the Buddha an Jesus suffered so and why so much spiritual growth is predicated on suffering. All that stuff we cling to that defines us doesn't matter. NOTHING MATTERS. Everything we think matters is an illusion, a stopping point. Screw that, no stopping! So, if nothing matters, the obstacles do not matter. The suffering of trauma doesn't matter either. All I have to do is learn that whatever I am clinging to that prevents my knowing the wisdom of these paths and understanding it doesn't matter. Simple right? Um...yeah...well work with me here! 

So, this time, I am going to see if I can grow and not be so traumatized. How you might say?

1. I am going in by doing the MM before hand asking that these lessons appear in a way that I can grow without the trauma. 

2. I am enlisting the help of Dawn Devani aka The Psychic. She helped heal me from a relationship block and I helped her heal from dual traumas. We seem to have the right 'touch' for each other. 

She is going to routinely look for blockages brought up by this work and clear anything unnecessary to the lesson. Thereby reducing the obstacles and hopefully the traumas. 

In return I am going to help her do some very deep healing work. 

The other reason I am doing this as I will not have the balancing factor of formal initiation here. So, I am thinking this work with Dawn is that balancing factor. 

PLEASE feel free to weigh in on this one, on and off line. This is especially requested of you quietly reading GD folks out there and other initiatory groups/people. 

Friday, September 28, 2012

Important Lessons

I have learned two important things in the last 24 hours.

The View

During meditation last night, I focussed on my higher self. From there I saw the Earth from space upon it, a small camp fire. Tiny. Me. Part of a whole.

Then I was told to ask for me as the Ruach.

I saw the solar system, my fire the sun.

From the higher view I am part a part, humble. From the slightly less higher, I am the center of the universe.

I looked and asked for what I looked like from the perspective of my fiery soul. I saw a cat in combat. I asked what my fiery soul looked like and I saw a man of flame, patiently looking for water.

The Wisdom.

In Jack's comments to the Sitri post, he asked, "Even if your ideal is love, are you sure it's right to put your idea forward about the will and choices of another?"

My response was incorrect. So incorrect, I will not repeat it here. Earlier today, I sent him a short email with my point of view and asked him to educate about why I was incorrect. I do that. I need feedback especially on social issues. He didn't have time to reply before my continued cogitations landed on something. I sent him this:


Dear Friend Jack,

[Edited]

I find a better answer now. You asked if it is wise. The answer is no. One should not invert the games of others and call it just but eschew them altogether. It is better to focus on the beauty of perfection than those things that refract the light.

Thank you for teaching me.

Robert

Should Magick Be Taught?

When the Golden Dawn was founded, magick was not taught until one reached adept level. The point, I assume, was that your first task was to find out who you were, resist temptation to be what you are not, and develop enough self-awareness to know the difference.

I have seen the fallout of many a new magician's mistakes that resulted in serious health problems and psychological break downs. I suppose that is the price of playing with fire. I have even seen initiations into groups that should never have taken place but were granted more from the position of the group's or leader's ego than anything else. Can you say BOOM?

The bigger problem is that new and old magicians fall prey to their lower selves from time to time. We are all human. When lower self impulses are combined with magick, we are basically mixing selfishness with the power to change other people's lives.

One of Robert's Rules of Magick is this: All magick changes the relationship of one thing to another thing.

So, if you do magick to get a woman, get a job, get money, get a a book etc. you are changing the choices of another. Basically, if I change my relationship with a promotion (as in from separation to unity) I am also changing the relationship of another inversely. No big deal you say.

What if you attract a girl you would have never met, have great sex and she or you misses the opportunity to be with a life mate? Oh, watch the magicians rationalize that away. Congratulations single person of 20 for getting that job! Too bad the mom whose husband just ran off with a bimbo leaving her with two kids to feed didn't get it. She should have learned magick. Not my fault they scream. Uh huh.

I did a "harmless" magick once to see if it worked. I did magick to have a conversation about baseball at work. A man was transferred from one job to another, told to move to the wrong office, we had our conversation and he moved elsewhere within an hour. Had he had a car accident would that have been my fault? What if he loved his old position and hated his new one? That was needless interference in another's life.

From a spiritual perspective, there are many ways of reaching higher states that do not involve such magicks. So, it isn't necessary to teach them to those seeking that goal. In fact, the powers so given by magick can be a distraction in and of themselves. Moreover, the results of the magick can distract one for a lifetime, especially when one does deep impact magick that satisfies one's lower nature to a point that overrides one's spirit. In short, to be what one is not.

From a long-term view (i.e. lifetimes) none of this matters. From a short-term view, it can have huge impacts on lives. I do not want some magician chasing his crotch to interfere with my relationship even unintentionally do you? I do not want some magician trying to help and impoverished town shutting down my factory so it moves there.

This is one of those arguments I have made since my practice of magick began. The MM and it's fallout tells me that nothing really matters, especially those ego comforting little magicks we do feel better about life. This is why Jesus and Buddha suffered so. To teach them that this stuff matters not. They just purged the fullness of their souls instead of the little bits I have purged. The process is the same. They just did it on a much larger scale.

And now to completely contradict myself, I know a guy that was at a severe disadvantage in life and used magick to even the playing field. I have no reason to argue with him. In fact, I plan on conversing with him as there is something to learn there.

I am also not opposed to doing magick to further one's soul purpose, if one knows that. Yet, how often should that be necessary? Then again, if no one teaches it, how would one know how to use it to that end?

These are my thoughts. I have reached no conclusions. I do not oppose people like Jason Miller that teach very practical magicks. Jason does teach wisdom, warns of fallout and includes ethical decision making. I may be okay with teaching magicks from a spiritual perspective with the admonition not to use them practically as it becomes a distraction or teach them to people doing thaumaturgy and naught else. I don't know.

Someone is likely to post some counter arguments to this that are completely valid. Others may agree and also be completely valid. I think this is a worthy discussion to have but leave conclusion up to you.

Healing the Self

Over the past year, I have been working on healing others. During that time, I have lost weight. I have dropped from 226 to 206. Rather than a study drop, I dropped 10 pounds being a vegetarian then plateaued .I dropped the vegetarian thing and counted calories. I have dropped another ten. Three more pounds and I will have achieved that medically significant ten percent reduction.

This has taken almost no effort on my part at all. I am wondering if by entering the currents that heal others, I have absorbed that current myself. If so, that is a sort of instant karmic reward. If not, it is a fun coincidence.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Jack's Response to Sitri Post

Jack posted a large comment to my last post. So, I thought I'd address it point by point here in the same order has he presented his questions. I must admit my post was a bit disjointed and unclear as I made the mistake posting while on pain medication. If I can't read the Life of Buddha, I likely shouldn't post.

The Jack's comments are in italics.

You saw this demon sitting on a person? When?

Yes. I was doing a meditation just to clear remaining ties to an individual. I call it LSD. Look, See, Dissolve. Cute, no? I wasn't cutting ties for protection, or to snap them back or anything like that. I didn't expect to find this at all. Nowhere in my imagination had I thought of anything like this. Originally, I saw what I expected to see. Thin cords of attachment. We all make those with all sorts of people in our lives. At one point, as I touched one of them, I 'slide' down it and saw what I saw.

I make no apologies for seeing what I saw anymore than if I saw you walking down the street. This was not a peak through a bedroom window. As for when, not long ago.

Also, is there really a problem if someone just wants sex with them getting it? 

Not usually, unless you're married and your spouse doesn't know, screwing your best friend's mother or that sort of thing. I am surprised you'd ask me that one, Jack. You know me well enough to know better.

Even if your ideal is love, are you sure it's right to put your idea forward about the will and choices of another?

Sure, especially since this person has no problems doing that regarding other people's choices. In this case, if I am right, and I think I am, that particular working had a huge amount of fallout on others that they didn't asked for. I have always had a problem with that sort of magick. It is sloppy, inconsiderate and more than a bit rude. That said, my next post is going to be entitled, "Magicians - Are We Stupid?". That will clear up more of my opinion of the matter for which, I will get hammered. I'm good with that. 

You keep mentioning INVOKING the spirit versus EVOKING the spirit: how do you know this is precisely what you're seeing?

Very sloppy writing on my part.

I haven't seen too many of the of the seventy-two  land on someone that was just walking down the street minding their own business. Other sorts of nasties yes, spirits from that book? Not in my experience which is not to say that it doesn't happen. To a competent magician? Even less likely. Your experience may vary widely from mine. I mean, how many demons have I seen? Not many. However, if one of these lands on you, it is exploiting a weak spot extraordinaire. 

So, my educated guess is evoked and lost while thinking he won. The symbolism of this thing sitting on his head is pretty clear it isn't a win. The only other possibility is that I put that image there for me to see. Possible? Yes. I've read the all the traits outlined in the Lesser Key. So, that information would be available from my subconscious but honestly I never ever considered this a possibility for that person. Usually, projection like that comes with pre-suspicion, at least for me. Never in my wildest dreams would I have though this person capable of this much slop. It is completely counter to my idea of him.

I'm not calling your assessments dubious, but the information you're giving out is a bit lopsided. 

Jack, if you didn't call my assessment dubious, I think I'd check your ID to make sure it was you. My prejudice may be reflected within certain opinions expressed. It is not reflected by what I clearly saw.

In the previous post all you tell us is that someone 'raised' (which I interpret as 'evoked') Sitri, and lost. No data is given on how, or why, this might have occurred.

I was being circumspect for a reason. That reason is that I'm not going to violate this person's privacy to that extent here. Heck, I've never even mentioned the name of the woman who did the very bad thing and that was intentional. I'm not going to break down some psychological assessment of this person or a chronology of events that I can tie ,admittedly, with spit and bubble gum tie to this.

I am already pushing my line of privacy breach here. I likely wouldn't have said anything at all had I need perceived the fallout impacting the privacy of others in very non-private ways. 

From my previous post, "willinglie deteineth secrets of women, laughing at them and mocking them"


In this post you suggest that they're Invoking the demon. Is this due to the language that they used when they performed the rite? E.G. "I call upon and invocate you, NN Spirit, that you might come to me and yadda yadda yadda in the holy and awesome names of yadda yadda yadda"? In that case, the difference is just in language and interpretation. If the person sat down and said, "yep, and I call upon Sitri whenever I want to have hot sex, and I let Sitri live in me and we need to be together forever," then that's different, I think.


Naturally, I do not know that. Sloppy writing on my part. Frankly, though, I don't really care. That thing sitting on top of someone's head explains SO MUCH. Could I be wrong? Yes. Am I? Maybe, but not likely in full. I have spent way too much time doubting and looking at some things in the best possible light as far as others are concerned. No more. No one spends that much time hiding in inexplicably denying things that doesn't have something to hide.

 I just find this post to be... odd.

You are telling me? How shocked do you think I was to see that? However, pieces of puzzles slide into place for me. It is simple as that.

Sitri (of the Goetia)

A couple of days ago, I posted about seeing a demon sitting over the spirit of a man. The demon, Sitri, has a abilities, this is among them, "causeth them [opposite sex] also to show themselves naked if it be desired."

A demon sitting atop a man's spirit is a sad sight to see. Pause and visualize what I saw for a moment. This, from the Lesser Key of Solomon, may help with that, "The Twelfth Spirit is Sitri. He is a Great Prince and appeareth at first with a Leopard's head and the Wings of a Gryphon but after the command of the Master of the Exorcism he putteth on Human shape, and that very beautiful."

So, who do you think that beauty is for? The inattentive magician will look at this and say the beauty is what attracts the opposite sex. How so? She can't see him. The beauty is to beguile the magician. Sitri's attractiveness is really the RESULT.

The beauty is that the magician sees what is beautiful to his human eyes, the naked woman/women. The beauty is a glamour that he keeps chasing and allowing the demon to find for him. The problem is that the demon is SITTING ON HIS SPIRIT. Sitri distracts him from the evolution of his soul and refocuses that power on the pleasant acceptance of woman kind.

So, the magician gets he wanted but did the Magician get what He NEEDED?

This is the full text of the Lesser Key regarding Sitri:

The Twelfth Spirit is Sitri. He is a Great Prince and appeareth at first with a Leopard's head and the Wings of a Gryphon, but after the command of the Master of the Exorcism he putteth on Human shape, and that very beautiful. He enflameth men with Women's love, and Women with Men's love; and causeth them also to show themselves naked if it be desired. He governeth 60 Legions of Spirits. His Seal is this, to be worn as a Lamen before thee, etc.

With this the magician can look at himself at a level higher and say he is looking for love. Who doesn't want that? No blame there, unless you haven't learned the difference between love and sex. If you're calling a demon like this and you don't know the difference, you are is so much trouble.

Do you see anything at all specific? It says, "He enflameth men with Women's love, and Women with Men's love..." Enflame. 

Let's check Dictionary.com which refers you to inflame.

1.to kindle or excite (passions, desires, etc.).
2.to arouse to a high degree of passion or feeling: His harangue inflamed the rabble.
3.to incite or rouse, as to violence: His words inflamed the angry mob to riot.
4.(of an emotion, as rage) to cause to redden or grow heated: Uncontrollable rage inflamed his face.
5.to cause inflammation in: Her eyes were inflamed with crying.

Which definition do you think the magician wants and which is he likely to get given that he is invoking a DEMON?

Does the Lesser Key entry say whose love will be enflamed? Will love between two others be inflamed in a negative way causing one party to stand naked emotionally and thus ready to be taken advantage of by this demon?  How much rage would that cause? Do people appear in his life and harangue the magician?

The demons appear in other texts. What I didn't realize that these texts can be compared and more about the critter in question can be revealed. Here is the Pseudomonarchia Daemonum's entry on Sitri:

Sitri, alias Bitru, is a great prince, appeering with the face of a leopard, and having wings as a griffen: when he taketh humane shape, he is verie beautiful, he inflameth a man with a womans love, and also stirreth up women to love men, being commanded he willinglie deteineth secrets of women, laughing at them and mocking them, to make them luxuriouslie naked, and there obeie him sixtie legions. 

willinglie deteineth secrets of women, laughing at them and mocking them

I have always wondered why this person of great compassion could encourage very belittling behavior on the part of others when it comes to sexual exploits. I do not wonder anymore. He doesn't. Sitri does.
While that knowledge makes my compassion grow for him and anyone else in this situation. This.Is.Scary.Shit.

To the magicians out there:

You can control a demon and get what you want. The problem is that the demon just may have more control over you than know. The problem is that if your overall goal is spiritual growth, you can get pulled down into the mire quickly. If you are just about power and don't care about growth, then that won't bother you but really now, in this situation, who has the power?

Updates: My Nephesch; A Client; The Agnostic


Last night, I went through some old idiosyncratic ceremonial magick stuff and put my Nephesch back in the bottle. I will master the skill of working with my Nephesch and keeping it under control. I just don't have that yet. As for last night, I slept better than I had in years. Sweet. I feel 'clean' and refreshed. This is a direct result of what I did last night. I am considering doing this as part of maintenance practice. If I do, I will outline that here.

I hesitate because this practice is very personal for me. Given all the personal stuff I share here, I hope I am forgiven for my reluctance.

On a related note, my back has been a mess over the past two days. It was shaky anyway but in this case the emotional hit from the Nephesch made it worse. This is one more reason why it will be awhile before I call on it for energy.

The Client:

I hate calling people clients. I consider each of them to be much more in the friend category. There is something that happens when I work to heal that fosters those feelings. Of course, humans are humans, the level of intensity varies.

I do not have a nickname for this person because the obvious would reveal too much about her. In fact, it would reveal the one thing she told me that I may not reveal. She wrote the following in a recent email about the healing work we have done together. Apologies for the one-word edit but it is necessary as it reveals the one thing as well.

- Knowing I'm not blocked xxxxxxx, and addressing my mental lockup by setting a regular schedule
- Recognizing that I have an idea in my head of what is a "right" way to live based on what I know of my parents' and brother's lives and ways of thinking, and how that affects me 
- Acknowledging that my life would be happier and more joyful if I let my true self manifest instead of restraining it (we keep coming back to this; it's a big issue for me)
I am not sure people understand how good it feels to be of use to others like that given my history.  Nothing feels better than to heal or in this case help people find a path past certain obstacles. This ability comes from a the path of Teth on the tree of life. I will post something called "Balancing Leo" that will explain that a bit more.
This is the same client that disturbed me so a while back. I saw her girl parts quite clearly. I asked her about a specific detail a day later to determine if I was seeing reality or some metaphor. My question came out as something pervy. I chastised myself for poisoning my healing. I have nothing against some healthy sexuality but it should not spill over to healing work. Ever. It deeply disturbed me and bothered the client as well.
This is what she told me in her letter of last week about that.
It's kind of like that image you had during one of our readings a while back that caused you so much confusion and worry. Now that some time has passed, I know EXACTLY what that was about. It was not a literal representation, but it was representative of some changes in my life since that time - basically, letting go of fears and judgments that had caused me to exclude things from my life that I enjoy, and that can help me grow and more fully express myself.

As posted in this space, I reached a similar conclusion from things on my end. I determined that this was a trust thing. I see nudity as an indication of the client's trust and what I see is not literal. I like non-literalness as that as it ensures proper privacy. My mistake was asking the client if what I saw was literal or not.

Perhaps, I should have said nothing about the image but delved into the picture for meaning like I do every other image I receive. That is half of what I do now. I see a similar image, take it as a trust image and move on quickly. Maybe I am assuming too much of what it means for each person. Maybe, I should just take a deeper look to make sure that is what it is. If not, just include it in the reading like I do with all else.

The Agnostic

Many will remember the Agnostic that did the the Manifestation Meditation while not believing she had a soul. Her original attempts in doing so were to get a job. I am not sure but I believe she stopped the MM long ago but now she has a job, a good job and one she is very comfortable with.

It doesn't surprise me that she is employed. Sooner or later that had to happen. The fact that she is comfortable after having so much mental distress tells me this may be the MM at work.

My initial magicks worked like that. At first, I didn't believe in what I was doing. I wanted to but I didn't. Then as time moved on and I did know what I was doing in the present tense, I looked back. All those magicks I had done before had worked! At the very least, the goals of those magicks had all been reached.

We are all innate magicians and create much more than we think we do. HINT.



Wednesday, September 26, 2012

What I Learned Last Night

I am fascinated by the idea that the magicks I saw last night do not bother me at all. I am actually amused.

What bothers me is the present day hiding, denial and social bullshit. That is really my ego. It is a search for validation which in reality means nothing. My only question is W.T.F.? Needing that from people that did that is like wanting a Best Dressed award from Oscar Madison. This is no insult to Oscar at all but a condemnation of my need for social vaporware which is exactly what my little self condemns others for. One word: Hypocrisy.

I expect this will yield some fruit and is part of the Work I am doing, even though it feels like I just dropped into the sewer of the past. I will figure out where this need to prove being wronged comes from. This must be purged. It interferes with seeing perfection, even while being perfection...um yeah.

I know that contraction makes no sense. Welcome to my head. 


The Nepshesch Strikes Back and Book

My Nephesch is fighting and being strong. It is winning. This is irritating.

The next time I think I'm going to call that thing for temporary strength, someone hit me over the head with a brick. Wait, that already is happening.

Basically, I have returned to thoughts of the very bad thing. Well, not really. It is more of the cover up undertaken by those after the fact, how they got put in that position and the distortions told all those years to hide their involvement. I have sent a few harsh emails on that and a tangentially related situation. This is Old Robert crap.

Oddly, as I was trying to break the links between those people in my past life [for their protection], I encountered some odd magics that I did not go looking for. One stoked my anger at the woman that did the very bad thing so another could remain hidden. Clever shit that and pretty nasty result for me. This wasn't pernicious it was just a selfish magick.

When that thing was cast, the person behind it had no reason to do such a thing in my direction. We were friends or so I thought. At worst, the relationship was cordial on both sides but I remember it as much better than that. I have learned a lot of people back then that I thought were friends were not, even when they truly believed they were.

That stoked anger is one of the things that caused so very much collateral damage to others and my self-esteem. Just like my behavior is doing now. I feel I should be in better control. I will never say it caused my anger. I had that before. I also had good reason to be angry regarding the very bad thing. Even when I was yelling at others it was really about her (mostly). Maybe she earned that extra focus created by that spell. However, I don't think that is why the spell was cast. It was a diversion that a lot of people paid the price for. As the target, I resent it deeply.

That spell is no longer influential. Funny thing about magick, once you see it, it is easy to remove.

Another thing I found was that someone has raised Sitri...and lost. Sitri is a spirit from the Lesser Key of Solomon aka the Goetia. He causes people to appear naked...for that. The naked people are showing up but the price is so hefty the person has no idea they are paying it. Demons are tricky things. Very smart people get suckered by them. I sent a warning; it will be ignored. The only hope I have for this person is the shock of me seeing it may be a wake up call. I doubt it. Rather than soul searching, the response will be anger and denial.

If that summoning took place before are about the time of the very bad thing, the fallout was tremendous! No, it did not cause the very bad thing. Well it could have but that would be a huge amount of damage one was willing to cause to see a naked person. Then again, they call them demons for a reason. I just talked myself into and out of believing both sides of that. No way for me to know and I don't care. I know the difference between unintended fall out and intentional harm.

The past is past and everything was always perfect.

There was a good thing that resulted in this latest call to my Nephesch. When it responded to my call for energy, it was huge. Nephesch are normally small things to my vision. This stood within me almost to my height. It told me it was so big because I was getting bigger [spiritually] and that gave it room to grow. This I did not buy into. So, I give myself one point among this screw up.

I think it is time to put that genie back in the bottle but how? I was very sure I was past this. It looks like I will be going back to the basics of the MM tomorrow. This is not acceptable. 

Another odd thing was that the thought of working Goetia had crossed my mind again. I figured that with teh power of my immortal behind me, I could seriously control them. That is probably true. It is just as probable that they desire to do that was the beginning of the creeping Nephesch trying to wrestle back control. Good thing I didn't fall for that aspect of it.

This was a very cathartic post. I feel so much better!

Book

I finally figured out what I was missing with the book. The original draft took the position of spiritual alchemy.  I discussed the process as one of repair or purification. Now, I have reversed it to encompass my vision and knowledge of the perfection of all things. Now, I am making progress again.

Monday, September 24, 2012

The Nephesch Rises

Quite often, I am awakened with back pain or I cannot sleep for no apparent reason. Angst no longer plays a part.

Due to a lack of sleep one recent night, I called upon my Nephesch. I ordered it to take the energy that kept me awake, give me a peaceful sleep and then fill me with the energy as I woke. I was obeyed. I felt like I  had discovered something. This exercise was repeated the next day.

One word: Mistake

Since then behaviors have arisen that I have avoided for some time.  Defense by attack being the main one. At this point, the defense is unnecessary. Silliness! 

I learned these behaviors come from the Nephesch rather than the automatic personality. I also know that if I draw on the power of the lower soul it gains influence. This also means that I use the power of the Nephesch on purpose with a mindset towards getting in control of that influence. I can basically set a trap for myself. Eventually, I will gain strength and put my lower soul to my use rather than being dragged around by it. Even though that only happens occasionally now, I feel this is worth pursuing.

Wearing the White Robes

Saturday, I attended the Central Valley Pagan Pride event. I performed three soul readings and two tarot readings. Within those, I conducted healings. I served. I acknowledge my service and do not discount it like I would have in the past. I can do that without being egotistical about it. There is a peace in that.

That day, September 22, 2012 was a marked day in my existence. I wore white robes. I did not do so to claim Golden Dawn adept status. I will not do that. This is simply where I am. I am manifesting spirit more now than ever. I am in service.


Sunday, September 23, 2012

How Souls are Formed

Not all Soul readings are outlined here.

I have encountered a few very young souls over the past few months. They are learning what it means to have a body, deal with an internal life and interact with others. Confusion reigns.

Their animal souls (Nephesch) and automatic personalities are active, vibrant and normal. These bodies are the same as everyone else's. The exception being is the inability to pin anything down. Emotions flow to and fro across their internal landscapes. There is no ability to pin things down into a stable understanding. This makes it almost impossible to learn the lessons they need to absorb. They live in a state of torment. Each one seems to lack any understanding of how anyone could do anything to harm another. These new souls seem to do next to no harm to others. There is a beautiful innocence about them that the torment fails to tarnish.

The Divine Personalities (Ruach) are ill-defined. The energies are dormant or muted.

In the Golden Dawn Zelator initiation, we are told there is a subtle connection between fire and earth. This is reflected in the creation of the new soul. The Greater Neschemah, still a child Itself, sends forth a burst of energy as it embodies within a infant. This lightening bolt is fire and is best represented by a white Hebrew letter Shin. That burst leaves behind only the rudimentary structure of the divine personality. The baby soul has no direction because it has no real starting point. It has come forth from the void. This is best represented by the black letter Tau.

Emotionally-based challenges are most difficult for them. The intellect, while not diminished or defective takes a back seat. This reveals a pattern of Qabalistic juxtaposition. The Qabala teaches that the four worlds continually unfold from top to bottom as Fire, Water, Air and Earth. The Soul seems to need a pattern of Fire, Earth, Water, Air.

Air comes into play in two forms. The first form is memories of our early emotional experiences and any resolution that may have occurred. Air is associated with thoughts, ideas and the like. Memory is not a stretch. These memories are stored in the Ruach (Divine Personality). Ruach is the Hebrew word for air.

The memories of lessons learned for new souls float up to the Ruach and create vestigial energy patterns. The tenuous connection with the immortal soul saves the Ruach patterns for the next lifetime. As lifetimes go on, these patterns are augmented, solidify, broken down and reformed. Eventually, through the evolution of those patterns, wisdom filters up to the Greater Neschemah, completing the cycle.

This pattern may have something to do with the illnesses previously mentioned in this space. I have read for people with various forms of mental illness. In these cases, I often see the Tree of Life but with most of the paths transparent, indicating an energy void.  My working hypothesis, at the moment, is that these are young souls that have been incarnated often enough to begin to form Ruach energy patterns but not long enough to filled in experiential patterns that would fill in the paths. This makes the impulses coming from the Ruach more than a bit wild. So much so that the so-called normal people see an illness. At this point, I believe that mental illness is a stage of soul development rather than a a defect. Nothing is wrong, everything is perfect.

Of course, that does not apply to people with traumatic brain injury. I'd classify that as an illness. Though, this too is an experiential lesson that fills in the pattern.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Rufus Opus and I in the Same Place?


My Friday morning meditation focused on emotion. I filled myself with two desires, to live fully aware of all perfection and to live within/emit compassion. Emotionally-based practice is my norm now. Rarely do words get involved. I find it very easy to hold those places and let that energy flow into my sphere of influence.

The works and wisdom of my fellow bloggers are still respected but I do not read anyone's blog because I am on a peaceful journey down a slowly meandering river at about mach ten. I am moving in my own direction, far off the trodden paths of traditional magicks.

As the morning moved along, I found myself with a little extra time to enjoy my coffee. Rufus' blog is still on my iGoogle page and, from an impulse likely born of my meditation, I clicked the link coming across this:

Seek first the Kingdom of God, and all the other stuff will be added unto you. Thou art God.

 In the past, I would have bristled at the Kingdom of God phrase. This time the emotions from the meditation took the day. Perhaps what others see with that phrase is what I mean when I say all is perfection. Everything. Perfection reigns even in things that appear to human eyes as horrible abuses.

the other stuff will be added unto you

This too I have experienced but in reverse. All the other stuff really matters not. Gifts of peace, joy,  healing myself and others have followed or been added on as RO said.

Thou art God.

This too is true. I've talked about it as I began to do the soul readings. Knowing that everyone is THIS close to God, if they could only see it, feel it, remember, has brought more peace and less angst than I have enjoyed in this lifetime. I am sure most of you have seen that in my posts. What I never said, even though I knew, is that the only way to be THIS close to God is to be God. Yes, you are God; God is you.

So how did RO and I using such different methods, holding such different attitudes, both so full of anger (albeit at much different things) get to the same understanding?

Because there is only one Universe. Dive down to the center far enough and you're bound to bump into the others heading the same way. There is a fundamental truth. For me, in this moment, it is that everything, everything is completely perfect. Joy abounds.

A year from now, a lifetime from now, my understanding of that truth may be much different. I doubt the joy will be any less. 






Thursday, September 20, 2012

VI Guest Blogs on His Soul Reading


VI is my first guest blogger. I thank him for his efforts in that regard. His blog can be found here
When Robert asked me to guest blog on my Soul Reading, I was a little nervous. I've been doing magic(k) for over 15 years, and engaged in serious Work for 12, and to be honest, what I know is but a drop in the ocean. It's a lifetime gig, the Great Work or whatever you choose you call it – which is as it should be.

Like you, I read this blog and have watched Robert's shift towards a less traditional style, and such trials and tribulations as he chooses to make public. I've read his reports on Soul Readings and healings. Like you, I've been curious, and wondered what it entailed, and the rational side of me wondered just how much validity there was to the whole thing.

I say that, because I believe a certain level of open minded scepticism is required in occult work – a guard against insanity and delusion. I say that because I've lost my mind, and found it again, due to the praxis of magic. I've done terribly foolish things, out of arrogance and ignorance. I'm only human, as it were.

So when I tell you that, despite my open minded scepticism, the faculty I've long called my Deep Mind was regularly poking me to make contact with Robert for a reading, you may begin to understand something.

That something is quite simple, quite undeniable. Every bit of my magician's instincts were convinced this was the right thing to do. Those instincts, in various ways, have kept me alive and prospering in situations which were less than ideal. I've learned to trust them, to use the edge they give me. Other people have apparently learned to trust my facility for making connections, too. I won't mention any names, but anyone who follows our little corner of the blogosphere has probably stumbled across my brothers in arms.

My instincts were right, as usual.

I've never met Robert before. Never chatted, bar the emails we sent back and forth to arrange the readings. Aside from his words here, he was a stranger in California, and I was a man up at 2am in the NW of the UK. He's said it himself – there was an unusual chat before the reading. For me, that was a point of connection from my end, irrespective of the mystic connection Robert forges to do the reading.

So when we began, any nerves I had were easily assuaged. I sat back and let a new friend do his stuff. Unsurprisingly, the man knows his onions. I'm not a Ceremonial Magician by nature, but I know enough about the 'occult filing cabinet' known as the Qabbalah to be getting on with. It's not my system; too full of lines and angles for my taste, but it makes a useful reference map.

So when Robert outlined the various soul-portions, I had a rough knowledge of what he was talking about, even though we don't use the same map. That's the first thing I noticed, you see – that though the map and system were different, the insights were deeply accurate. I think back to a dream I'd had a couple of days before, which culminated in the realisation that we're all more whole than we think we are.  That in fact the narrow perceptions we have of ourselves and others are but shards; broken angles of a looking-glass which, if we were to put them together, would reveal the world of Primal Images.

Not so much a realm of Platonic Forms, but perhaps the All-At-Once, the Night of Pan which contains the Light of Creation?

Perhaps.

Certainly, if I were a betting man, it would be that fundamental holographic wonder of the universe on which I would place my monies as to how Robert does what he does. Now, I don't know how he came by such skills, aside from what he's mentioned here, and I'm certainly not the kind of person to breathlessly remark that 'We Are All One.'

Instead perhaps I shall quote Liber AL vel Legis:

"For I am divided for love's sake, for the chance of union." (AL I:29).

There is, I think, a certain boundless curiosity which is endemic to healers and seers the world over. Even if they don't like what they see, some part of them has a love of gnosis. Not necessarily in the Chaos Magic sense of the word but the inner knowledge of the Wholism, the Pleroma or Whatever.

I'm no healer, but I recognise my own curiosity and wonder within Robert. He's even said quite openly that the work is an honour, and I recognise that honour and acknowledge it. It'd be disingenuous to say that there is no honour in looking at my soul, or the soul of anyone. Robert has found his path, and it is part of his own Great Work, and to find that is an honour beyond measure, as any magician  worth their salt can attest.

To find that which opens one to the kosmos, to discover the way home, even as a first step, requires acknowledgement of one's own nature as being worthy of that Return. To recall once again that we are sons and daughters of heaven, children of all the worlds that ever were.

What Robert does is quite simply provide another pair of eyes, an acknowledgement of your own nature. He may discover imbalances, flaws or impressions of the world upon the soul-complex which at first may seem like damage, but in fact are doors and ways to rediscover the knowledge for yourself. Working on and with them gives you the keys to your own Whole.

 He does not push, does not enforce, and oftentimes, the wonder of yourself is obvious in his voice. He simply tells you what he sees, and communicates with you on as deep a level as you allow. I don't know for certain how much Robert knows what he's doing on multiple levels, but I can tell you for certain that he does. The thousands of miles between us meant nothing, and there was only, to my perception, joyful exploration.

I am glad and happy to have seen myself reflected in his inner eyes, because as with many things, much was confirmed that I already knew, and yet was unsure of the provenance of. To those of a more sceptical mind  I only say that his surprise regarding something he had never seen before was unsurprising to me, given my life and practice.

I'm completely sure that the advice he gave me was accurate, and in fact, from a practical point of view, implementing it has already produced some interesting results!

So, as we bring this guest post to an end, I'd like to thank my host, and offer you a few ideas to think on:  

O.E. g├Žst, giest (Anglian gest) "guest; enemy; stranger," the common notion being "stranger," from P.Gmc. *gastiz (cf. O.Fris. jest, Du. gast, Ger. Gast, Goth. gasts "guest," originally "stranger"), from PIE root *ghosti- "strange" (cf. L. hostis "enemy," hospes "host" -- from *hosti-potis "host, guest," originally "lord of strangers" -- Gk. xenos "guest, host, stranger;" O.C.S. gosti "guest, friend," gospodi "lord, master").

How much of your soul is strange to you?  How much remains unexamined, or locked away? How much can you answer the call of the Oracle at Delphi:

'Know thyself.'

Do you remember what it's like to be whole? Or perhaps, are you, like I, like Austin Osman Spare:

“I know too many gods… yet the greatest stranger to me is myself. And those who speak so glibly and knowingly of God (alleged Absolute), who know his ways, wills, desires, etc., are committed to their inferiority. The word 'God' once uttered seemingly proliferates into all ungodliness.”

For Spare also wrote:

“Myself, I have not yet seen a man who is not God already.”

So let me ask you; if your soul, your self is a stranger to you, then what will happen when you welcome it in and treat it to hospitality? What if you know it, love it for all that it is, this stranger at your hearth?

Didn't some guy make it clear, before they crucified him? Before they crucified a snake and fixed the volatile? You know the one – the gematria is clear: Nachash to Meshiach. Or maybe that's just the Gnostic in me – regardless:

“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 30  Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ 31  The second is this: ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

Just some things to think on, perhaps.

Be seeing you! - VI, 09/12


Traveling with Ruach

Wednesday night, My Gal asked me to look at her liver and see if things were well.

I called upon my highest soul and was told no. Confused, I asked why. I was told to use my Ruach. As I did, my heart rate increased or so I thought. Maybe it did but I think it was more the astral body getting excited, energized.

There was no transitional state. I was just 'there'. My view of the specific place I was looking for was much more 'real'. It looked like she had a transparent body, all but the liver.

This opens ideas on using the other bodies for other views. I will let that unfold as it may.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Soul Reading Report

I performed two soul readings last weekend. One of which is may be blogged by a guest blogger.

The second, I failed to write about in a timely manner. This means my memory has faded severely. I would need to the person I read for to provide reminders. So, I may be missing something important.

Her Nephesch (animal soul) reminded me of a faery. She lived in a wooded area (not unusual), giggled and ducked behind tree trunks. She'd laugh while holding her hand over her mouth as she darted from one tree to the next. She had a fear of being swatted on the butt. This was not a beating but a relatively light swat. I do not know if that was a trigger to childhood abuse long past or not.

Her automatic personality was not abnormal. There was nothing major there that I had not reported for others.

The Divine Personality was different. Normally, this part of the soul is not damaged. I have seen people that were both victims and perpetrators of vicious abuse and never seen this part damaged. I think the lower souls serve as a set of crumble zones. In this case, I cannot say she was damaged. However, she did have a blockage that she was obviously not born with.

That blockage resided upon the path of Leo between Severity and Mercy on the Tree of Life. This impediment was formed by someone who taught her to by hyper-critical. I have no idea if this was intentionally and overtly taught or if it was a subtle thing. My guess is that the training took place over time.

This so stunted the flow of energy that her Tipereth was muted. I cannot say it was black or even dark but it did not generate the energy and light it should. In fact, the internal paths to Tipereth were not energetic. They emitted next to no light. This means that she has a tendency to bounce between the right and left pillar because there is no balancing energy. She later reported that she has been diagnosed with being bipolar.

Frankly, I can stretch what I saw and say yes but I didn't feel anything that severe. I am aware that no one goes to a shrink for no reason. I'm sure she has symptoms that lead to that diagnosis. I am also aware that I am not a mental health professional. I am also sure any medication she would be given would alter her symptoms. However, I really do not think she has this disorder. If she does, it is on the low end of the spectrum.

I am beginning to believe that mental illnesses from Aspergers to everything else are the result of or cause of a lack of energy on the paths. Perhaps, someday, I will learn to fully reenergize the paths and provide some serious healing to folks.

I did remove the block I saw. It was a bit stubborn but I got rid of a good bit of it. I am not sure she fully owned that but we will see. Given she is aware of whatever symptoms drove her for clinical work and she was aware of her hyper-critical thoughts, I am anxious to know if that removal resulted in a symptom change. If she reports to me one way or the other, I will report that here.

I also had a feeling that she feels I was wrong on somethings. She didn't say so but sometimes I just get that feeling. Though, usually that is with tarot readings more than soul readings. However, I did get the swings and hyper-critical part quite right.

Sin:

The only possible sin is a misstep away from the Universal Love of the Other.