Monday, April 1, 2013

PTSD Client: Verbatim Conversation



    This is a cut and paste of an internet chat conversation I had today. The important part here is not the esoteric. Look for the words and attitudes that foster healing. That is the core of healing work and note that it came from her, not I.

  • Today (My addition of date 4/1/2013)

  • Myself

    how have you been?

  • Friend

    Hi Robert, I have a migraine right now but took meds to get it to ease. How are you? Did you receive my note and lock of hair? I had an interesting experience this weekend. This past week was okay; anxiety was low. The prior weekend (the 23rd, Saturday), I experienced what felt like a great flow of energy through the crown of my head* and then felt incredibly peaceful and calm all day. The next day, Sunday the 24th, I experienced this same thing to a much lesser degree and for a shorter period of time. I was able to call an Aunt of mine with whom I've been out of contact with for well over a year and we had a wonderful conversation. We are now back in touch and I discovered a dream I had of her and my grandmother was, indeed, predictive of her very loving reaction.
    I also had a very disturbing dream around Wed of last week which included my sister, grandmother and grandfather (both long passed away) and a beloved pet who I had to put down in 2006. I know this dream was also from my grandmother, so I meditated on that. The experience this weekend was so profound! It was as if my heart chakra opened up, but at first it felt like a great pain... sort of like a massive broken heart. You know how you can feel the pain of a broken heart? But I went with this pain and allowed myself to feel it; allowed it to flow through me. I began to realize that it wasn't really a broken heart and it wasn't my pain. This was all intuitive...
    It felt like I was feeling someone else, so I reached out and searched; it felt like my sister, but as though she was hiding from me. The pain felt like great saddness mixed with love and longing. She was hiding so I visulized her and began to talk out loud to her. I finally found her face... I searched for which "version" of her was in pain and found the version... [my insert -- an old photograph]. I talked to her about that time and told her she would always be safe with me. She seemed to question me about why I was holding my cat (in the dream), as if I loved my cat more than her. She seemed upset by that, but I explained that his soul was tied to me, connected to me, as was hers, grandma's, and grandpa's and I couldn't let him get washed away in the flood, but "how about you help me look for a cat carrier to put him in... that way I can carry him and put my arm around you as well." That way I can comfort her at the same time. And I tell her she will always be safe with me. She seems to be happy with that.
    I seemed to just know it was my heart chakra opening; I saw the green spinning, felt the need, knew it was her, reached out and found which part of her was at the root of her anger towards me, and attempted to help her.
    I don't know if I helped her, but I felt much, much better. Headaches have been daily, but anxiety has been low if I have it at all... at least here at home. I still have anxiety about going out, though.
    How are you?

  • Myself

    wow that is FANTASTIC! Let me go to the mailbox and check brb
    recieved!
    I am checking my notes for when I worked on you...
    March 13 was very late at night. I wrote that I worked to repair the fact that your body was emitting too much astral light. One march 30 a huge yellow ball of light flew from me and hit her in the chest. Her chest area glowed brilliant white.
    My notes are two sketchy as I am used to blogging straight away. How do those dates figure into how you have felt? I can tell the desriptions matched.

  • Friend

    March 30 is the day I felt the incredible energy in my chest and sent it towards my sister; time? Um...
  • Myself

    Late morning or early afternoon my time (PST)

  • Friend

    I keep thinking it was about late morning/early afternoon my time (MST); it lasted about 30 minutes to an hour. It may have been ... I keep thinking about 2pm, but it may have been a bit earlier than that... I wish I had noted the exact time. I may have but don't have my notes near me.

  • Myself

    how have you been since these experiences?

  • Friend

    Other than the migraines (which have been daily; not unusual), in a much lighter mood (happier in general), anxiety low. I haven't been able to get out in my backyard to do watering though. Or go out to do other things, but feeling better mood wise... definitely.

  • Myself

    Excellent! Can I just copy and paste this conversation (minus your name) as a blog post?
    oh and minus that bit about  (my edit)

  • Friend

    Sure; I also want to post/write, but I'm not in shape to do this yet. I'm still too tired and not quite sure how or in what order to write things.
  • I still have a lot to say about The Hanged Man, and my meditations on that card have helped a great deal. Dreams have been more like nightmares, BUT my grandmother has been in them which tells me she is with me again and guiding me again. My senses/gifts are slowly returning. This is a VERY good thing. 

  • Myself

    that is ok. We cannot expect everything at once. Attempt new things as you are able and under the advise of your professional care giver.
    This is good news
    As I am seeing this now, we will continue regular work as I am inspired The only problem I can see is what happens when I cannot for some reason. I am not sure how to mitigate that problem. I am giving it thought and consideration.
    Then again, I only helped about once a week so far, even a little less.

  • Friend

    Indeed... and your blog led me to read VI's blogs which are incredibly timely. About stories... which have been helpful with my own healing. As I watch shows, movies, read, reflect, those stories help me with my own understanding and knowledge within my own life.
    I feel so much more peaceful, and though I still have a long way to go, I have come such a very long way... and I thank you SO very much for your continued help, Robert. You have no idea.
    And please don't worry about when... do what you can when you can. I am a very hard worker and have done a lot of work on my own. You really are helping. I feel encouraged by these results thus far.

  • Friend

    Did you do some work just now, or just a few minutes ago? I felt that crown energy again...

  • Myself

    I am so glad to hear that xxxxx. Remember to keep track of the eventful days (good and bad) and I will take better notes...at least when I am not doing it at 1 AM or something. Yes that can happen . I have to run for now as I have some homework to do before class....
    No but I can feel you a bit. This is not unusual with the folks I work with. Conversations tend to stimulate the healing process a bit.

  • Friend

    Oh, yes... I'll take much better notes now, you bet. take care of yourself, Robert! Bye now! I hope to be on line more often. And thank you again. 

  • Myself

    anytime my friend. I am happy there is improvement. 

    * I recall doing work directly with the crown of her head but I can find no note, no time and it is like remembering a dream. I am pretty sure it was not but could have been. 

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