Friday, April 22, 2011

Speaking of Pass Over

My father passed over today suddenly. While he was well past seventy, a long time diabetic and obviously in decline, it was quite a shock. He probably suffered a heart attack or stroke. I will eulogize him in this space sometime in the near future.

When I heard the news, I was calm and fine. By the time I got home from work, I was not. It was a bit hard to keep it together. However, I knew I had family to see. Showing up as a mess would not have served them well. So, I fixed it.

I popped into my temple room, did the LBRP, the BRH and the called up upon the god name of Geburah and asked for strength, not severity. I asked that I be given the strength to serve my family. I called the angel and before I could ask for that, he told me to call the hierarchy of Chesed as well. After the angel, I called the choir.

The god-name resonated in my head, the angel in my torso, and the choir around my waste to my legs like a skirt.

I called upon the hierarchy of Chesed and asked to be shown what form of mercy each person needed. I experienced the same sensations in my body.

Oddly, the day went much better than one should expect. We spent a lot of time laughing. I do have the ability to be comic relief but I wasn’t the only one.

At one point, I felt the spirit of my father. He was gloriously excited. He was amazed that ‘"you folks were right", meaning he was still aware. he didn't believe in an after life. He was thrilled that he could see, “it is so bright here. Dad I can see!” Then he told me all of this doesn’t matter. Death doesn’t matter at all. "Next time around, I will be your son."

He could tell I was going to take some of his grave dirt for use in protecting my home. I told him it was traditional to leave an offering and I wasn’t about to leave him alcohol. He didn’t drink after an incident involving Peppermint Schnapps in his twenties. He asked me to leave a baseball, as it always reminded him of me. It had to be used one.

I will do that, Dad. I will do that. 

8 comments:

Gordon said...

Oh Robert, I'm so sorry for your loss!

You and your family are very much in my thoughts.

Jow said...

Oh Robert, I am so sorry. My prayers are with your family.

Melissa said...

I'm so sorry for your loss! You and your family are in my prayers.

Maya said...

I admire your strength. I hope that your father remains in your heart and is in an after-life.

Maya said...

Dear Robert, I admire your strength. I hope that your father remains loved in your heart and is in an after-life. Peace

WitchDoctorJoe said...

"I am just a leaf on the family tree of life. It is my autumn, but I will never be far from the tree. From now on, whenever you see a single leaf fall, remember, that's me waving hello. Bet you can't catch me."

We are sorry for your loss.

Blessed Be.

nutty professor said...

I am very glad that he/you made contact. I know that the loss is hard, but how wonderful to be free from embodied suffering. Take care.

Christopher said...

I'm really sorry for your loss. I think your most recent post, the one regarding death,is broadly speaking the most accurate perspective.