Last weekend I posted this cryptic jumble of words. I had a couple of comments which stopped after I said I'd post about it later in the week. I've had some back channel questions on it even after that. So, here goes...
I'm at a point in my Golden Dawn based career where I am on my own. There are certain things I must do to advance to the rank of adept. Frankly, I'd do them anyway. I'm climbing that tree one way or the other. I have no doubt I can do the ritual work necessary. I have some doubt as to a couple of technical issues. So, I wrote to my mentor about one of the two things I was considering doing. It had to do with a particular spirit I must call that has a relatively scary association. I have the courage to meet it. My question was technical in nature.
The moment I hit the send button the spirit landed on me or maybe it was the energy of that spirit. Yes it was a bit scary. My way of looking at things like that is that the spirit would not have been so present were I not ready to deal with it. So, I dove in writing a balanced ritual. However, I didn't have some technical details that mattered. I don't shy away using maybes anymore. This was important, at least to me.
So, the universe dropped a spirit in my lap and I wasn't ready to met the challenge. It was a frustrating moment for me.
Why didn't I just pop into a meditation and deal with the spirit? Damn good question. Then again, as a good friend recently pointed out, there is a reason I am less crazy than others. I am a careful magician.
We called the Helpful Deity last night.
We asked if there was a method to call It so that we weren't so psychologically wonky after It left. It gave us a small tip. We were also not tripped out during the afterglow. It felt nice and right. It felt like I feel after a GD-type initiation only a bit different.
I asked if I could reveal its name. The answer was, and I quote, "No. No. No." The explanation was something neither of us had thought of but makes absolute perfect sense. I trust the answer.
We were also instructed a more balanced way of calling It. This will require some research on my part but it shouldn't be too bad.
It also did some healing work on my partner. This was interesting as IT would not let me feel my partner's pain but It did let me feel It's compassion. This was really cool. Time will tell the effect last night will have on my partner. I will report what she feels comfortable with. She is more private than I.
We are a bit concerned as it seems focused on something that gives us pause. It is something that, if I posted about, you, my genteel reader, would get all over me for. You'd be concerned. However, if you were a hoodoo practitioner or voodoo or from some other culture, you may not be. Hard to tell. Obviously, there isn't many folks I can talk to about this one.