I woke up this morning with a realization. My life coaching clients and students (for lack of a better word...I strongly dislike that word) are making more improvements in their lives than I am. My life has been going quite well in every area. Even work is calm for the moment. Though, I do see the storm coming there.
I have become complacent in my own work. I find myself having all the ability, spiritual awareness and relationships that I have always wanted. I teach without teaching, live pretty much effortlessly and enjoy 90% of my daily interactions with people. Heck that number may be low.
More of my highest soul is manifesting now than ever before. I am more than mentally healthy; I am spiritually aware. My actions are considered and not automatic. I love who I am. I love who you are and I have never met you. I know you are totally worth of God. I KNOW THAT.
There is more that I want to do. I know there is more room to grow. I know there is more to Being. I am just not sure what that is but I do know this.
I am going to find out.
Friday, August 16, 2013
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Doing Dangerous Magick (Results)
In this post, I outlined some dangerous magick that I did. To sum up, a woman's ex-husband arrived from Mexico to kidnap their daughter and take her back. My magick put a stop to that. He has been deported. Due to various circumstances there is only an unlikely prospect of him ever being able to return.
Like I said in my first post, this is dangerous magick. I do not recommend doing this sort thing. VERY BAD STUFF can happen.
Like I said in my first post, this is dangerous magick. I do not recommend doing this sort thing. VERY BAD STUFF can happen.
Monday, August 12, 2013
A Brief Exercise in Non-Duality
I have a series of small Facebook posts that start like this:
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write down three ways you give to others and three ways you take from others. Then seriously consider how the take column is really giving and the giving column is really taking.
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to...
These posts are sometimes silly. Other times they are quite serious. All of them are designed to stretch reality a bit. I have been out and about and have friends of friends tell me how much they look forward to the posts. Of course, they say they perform the tasks. I have to confess that I don't do all of them.
Today's left me with a sense of cognitive dissonance and wonder. So, for your enjoyment, here it is:
Give this one a try and if you like, let me know how it goes in the comments section.
Sunday, August 11, 2013
The Helpful Deity Returns
Flower and I haven't worked much together for some time. A few months back, I had four straight nights of dreams involving snakes. In the first, a woman handed me a snake that was in the shape of an infinity symbol. She was huge and I couldn't see above her shoulders. I missed the symbolism of that. After the fourth dream, I told Flower about them. She said that she'd been dreaming of snakes too. Her little girl was also waking after dreams of snakes.
That is when it hit me. She was calling us. Just then Flower than I became quite ill with pneumonia. We made it back into circle once we healed and something unusual happened.
Flower, is quite cautious. The gods try to get her to understand what they want of her. Sometimes, like all of us, she does not get it. Other times, it seems like a refusal to understand or a refusal to put what she knows in practice. Earth signs! This time, the Helpful Deity took care of that. I could 'see' the resistance in her mind being removed. I could see earthen shelves against the wall so her mind. One moment they were there, the next the faded and in a heartbeat they were gone. Cool stuff! She said that she has never felt so comfortable with the Goddess. She has always liked male deities best.
We wondered how this would impact her life. Slowly the changes became apparent. She is becoming much more accepting of change. In fact, I have seen her start to have fun with it.
Last week we felt the call again. We both knew it was strong beyond what we have felt before.
Our circle technique is unique. I don't know of anyone that does it this way. We sit in temple space in meditation. I am 'given' a mantra. I repeat it until I feel it is time to stand up. I repeat the mantra until the Hermes enters me and the Helpful Deity enters Flower.
The entire affair can get intense and quite stoic and They have chided us for that in the past. "Wear some color!", "Have fun", "Why so dour?" Many of our rituals are more fun but when we can wind up suddenly finding ourselves chatting with Hades in his lair to Pan playing his pipes upon a thinly forested trail to standing within a field of stars, one does have a tendency to take things seriously. Though we never shy away from where we are taken.
This time, I cannot share anything about the ritual itself. I can say this. It was the most intense ritual I have ever participated in. I laughed. I cried. I revealed in Their presence. At times, I could not tell the difference between Them and myself. As usual I spoke words that were not my own but this time there was so much less me there. If He wanted me to stand on my roof naked and cluck like a chicken, I would have. I am appreciative that He did not want this of me.
There was I time when I was full me. The big me. The one full of soul, connected spirit whose humanness is minimal. That me said, "Take everything. Take it all. Take everything." I begged and pleaded with the Goddess. "Take it!" I have little idea of what I was asking Her to take. I did so without fear. I wanted to crawl into Her toes and pop out her head. I have never been so alive.
Flower has never embodied the Goddess so completely I was proud of her. After she said like she left parts of herself all over the universe. Fits with the theme of me begging to have everything taken away.
As for the results, I will let you know
That is when it hit me. She was calling us. Just then Flower than I became quite ill with pneumonia. We made it back into circle once we healed and something unusual happened.
Flower, is quite cautious. The gods try to get her to understand what they want of her. Sometimes, like all of us, she does not get it. Other times, it seems like a refusal to understand or a refusal to put what she knows in practice. Earth signs! This time, the Helpful Deity took care of that. I could 'see' the resistance in her mind being removed. I could see earthen shelves against the wall so her mind. One moment they were there, the next the faded and in a heartbeat they were gone. Cool stuff! She said that she has never felt so comfortable with the Goddess. She has always liked male deities best.
We wondered how this would impact her life. Slowly the changes became apparent. She is becoming much more accepting of change. In fact, I have seen her start to have fun with it.
Last week we felt the call again. We both knew it was strong beyond what we have felt before.
Our circle technique is unique. I don't know of anyone that does it this way. We sit in temple space in meditation. I am 'given' a mantra. I repeat it until I feel it is time to stand up. I repeat the mantra until the Hermes enters me and the Helpful Deity enters Flower.
The entire affair can get intense and quite stoic and They have chided us for that in the past. "Wear some color!", "Have fun", "Why so dour?" Many of our rituals are more fun but when we can wind up suddenly finding ourselves chatting with Hades in his lair to Pan playing his pipes upon a thinly forested trail to standing within a field of stars, one does have a tendency to take things seriously. Though we never shy away from where we are taken.
This time, I cannot share anything about the ritual itself. I can say this. It was the most intense ritual I have ever participated in. I laughed. I cried. I revealed in Their presence. At times, I could not tell the difference between Them and myself. As usual I spoke words that were not my own but this time there was so much less me there. If He wanted me to stand on my roof naked and cluck like a chicken, I would have. I am appreciative that He did not want this of me.
There was I time when I was full me. The big me. The one full of soul, connected spirit whose humanness is minimal. That me said, "Take everything. Take it all. Take everything." I begged and pleaded with the Goddess. "Take it!" I have little idea of what I was asking Her to take. I did so without fear. I wanted to crawl into Her toes and pop out her head. I have never been so alive.
Flower has never embodied the Goddess so completely I was proud of her. After she said like she left parts of herself all over the universe. Fits with the theme of me begging to have everything taken away.
As for the results, I will let you know
Monday, August 5, 2013
Signs You Are a Theurgist
Nick Farrell wrote signs that you might not be a real magician. You can find a beautiful counter response at Post Modern Magic. In reading these I am reminded of my response to the glass half full question. In my opinion, most folks just have the wrong sized glass.
A successful theurgist is not worried about who is doing it wrong and who is doing it right. We are concerned with doing it.
"There is a place between right thinking and wrong thinking; I will meet you there." -- Gilbran.
A successful theurgist is not worried about who is doing it wrong and who is doing it right. We are concerned with doing it.
"There is a place between right thinking and wrong thinking; I will meet you there." -- Gilbran.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Habits for Spiritual Living: Needing Versus Being
The other day, I had a talk with Mr. Craig Slee, aka VI. As far as I can tell, the discussion has nothing to do with this post directly. Last night, I had a dream that also has nothing to do with this post. Some combination of the discussion and the dream led me to realize something. This is the equivalent of adding two and two and coming up with with sixteen without being aware of the intermediate steps.
2 + 2 = 4; 4 + 4 = 8 and 8 + 8 = 16.
There is a difference between those that need to help and those that are available to help. Both may have the skill set you need but the former adds too much of himself into the equation. This results in a perpetual need to return to him or her because the help you get is almost helpful. You feel like things are just around the next metaphorical bend in the road. Yet, whatever that thing is never seems to come. Those that are available to help provide assistance based on their experience combined with the just enough knowledge about yourself to be able to speak with you, in your language. They keep out of your way and let you evolve your way.
I share the Manifestation Meditation and perform as a life coach knowing these things in a way I never knew when I taught Golden Dawn stuff. The difference between my two approaches leads to an understanding of needing versus being.
When I taught before, I needed to be understood. That isn't teaching. That is seeking validation. That is needing to be the expert. Others that taught me, needed to be appreciated, loved, seen as the expounders of the mysteries. That too is seeking validation and emotionally needing to fill in an inner void. Both I and they did provide valuable insight and information. However, it was based on ego and thereby incomplete.
It is the ego that projects a false image of itself and therefore needs its projection reflected in the eyes of students. This is not a manifestation of attainment but a watery reflection that wavers as soon as a falling leaf touches the surface of a pool. That leaf being any probing question of spirit that touches the inner void space of the teacher.
Being is having an understanding of one's own universe and living 'in place'. Nothing can shake you from that place. This allows one to be available to answer questions, ask them and lend a helping hand without owning (and thus trying to control) the result. It leaves the student with the ability to answer her own questions and thus satisfy her spiritual needs.
This applies to more than teachers. I know a woman that does good work at the office but the work is a reflection of her need to be recognized. She labors under the false illusion that recognition will fill the void. It never will. So much more content would she be if she performed work directly for the benefit it offered both herself and others. Those benefits being significantly intangible. Double bonus points if she could get paid for it too. With her brains and talent she could do this. Never will she do it to fulfill a void. Never will she do it to fulfill an unnecessary need
Needs can be quite real and there is nothing negative in fulfilling them. More on that in a future post. However, one must learn to fulfill needs of being -- of spirit -- rather than the projections of ego. How do you tell? First, you recognize you are trying to fulfill a need. Then look for examples of successfully doing so. If in those moments you still have a tight gut, inner pain, and feelings of insecurity, you are fulfilling a false need of ego that will never be satisfied. When you are quiet and content for the long term, you are meeting your spirit needs. Again, more on that in a future post.
Note: Those of you that requested the Habits of Spiritual Living posts, may be interested in signing up for my life coaching newsletter. The topics there are simpler than my ramblings where with do-it-yourself tips. They are also professionally edited, unlike my scribblings here. Just click on the email link on this blog and request the newsletter.
2 + 2 = 4; 4 + 4 = 8 and 8 + 8 = 16.
There is a difference between those that need to help and those that are available to help. Both may have the skill set you need but the former adds too much of himself into the equation. This results in a perpetual need to return to him or her because the help you get is almost helpful. You feel like things are just around the next metaphorical bend in the road. Yet, whatever that thing is never seems to come. Those that are available to help provide assistance based on their experience combined with the just enough knowledge about yourself to be able to speak with you, in your language. They keep out of your way and let you evolve your way.
I share the Manifestation Meditation and perform as a life coach knowing these things in a way I never knew when I taught Golden Dawn stuff. The difference between my two approaches leads to an understanding of needing versus being.
When I taught before, I needed to be understood. That isn't teaching. That is seeking validation. That is needing to be the expert. Others that taught me, needed to be appreciated, loved, seen as the expounders of the mysteries. That too is seeking validation and emotionally needing to fill in an inner void. Both I and they did provide valuable insight and information. However, it was based on ego and thereby incomplete.
It is the ego that projects a false image of itself and therefore needs its projection reflected in the eyes of students. This is not a manifestation of attainment but a watery reflection that wavers as soon as a falling leaf touches the surface of a pool. That leaf being any probing question of spirit that touches the inner void space of the teacher.
Being is having an understanding of one's own universe and living 'in place'. Nothing can shake you from that place. This allows one to be available to answer questions, ask them and lend a helping hand without owning (and thus trying to control) the result. It leaves the student with the ability to answer her own questions and thus satisfy her spiritual needs.
This applies to more than teachers. I know a woman that does good work at the office but the work is a reflection of her need to be recognized. She labors under the false illusion that recognition will fill the void. It never will. So much more content would she be if she performed work directly for the benefit it offered both herself and others. Those benefits being significantly intangible. Double bonus points if she could get paid for it too. With her brains and talent she could do this. Never will she do it to fulfill a void. Never will she do it to fulfill an unnecessary need
Needs can be quite real and there is nothing negative in fulfilling them. More on that in a future post. However, one must learn to fulfill needs of being -- of spirit -- rather than the projections of ego. How do you tell? First, you recognize you are trying to fulfill a need. Then look for examples of successfully doing so. If in those moments you still have a tight gut, inner pain, and feelings of insecurity, you are fulfilling a false need of ego that will never be satisfied. When you are quiet and content for the long term, you are meeting your spirit needs. Again, more on that in a future post.
Note: Those of you that requested the Habits of Spiritual Living posts, may be interested in signing up for my life coaching newsletter. The topics there are simpler than my ramblings where with do-it-yourself tips. They are also professionally edited, unlike my scribblings here. Just click on the email link on this blog and request the newsletter.
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Doing Dangerous Magick
I had an acquaintance come to me about a month ago. She said her violent ex-husband returned from Mexico to kidnap her child and take her to live with him down there. She obtained this information from a close relative of the ex. This person had no reason to make this up. So, she took this as a serious threat. She asked me for magickal aid.
I do not get a lot of this sort of work. I specialize in healing, soul readings, transformational development and that sort of thing. The few of these I have received, I referred to Jason Miller. I have no idea if they contacted him or not. This one felt like I needed to take. I know why but I am not sharing that here.
This sort of magick is very dangerous. Trying to keep a parent away from a child is serious stuff. Think of what it would take to keep you away from your child. In creating that sort of separation, you are very likely going to create a huge tragedy. So, I did nothing to create separation. I did ask her to confirm the information with others and she did.
She thought it was best to get him deported. I told her that it would be best to allow the magick to flow along the path of least resistance. Deportation may look like that path to us but other things may go on as well. For instance, he could have an outstanding warrant.
I sensed the threat was not immediately eminent. So, I took a couple of days to figure out the best set of rituals to perform. On the third day, I was on the disc golf course when I received text that he was circling the baby sitter's house. My client was thirty miles away at work.
My only tool was pictures of mother, child and husband. Fortunately, I had separate pictures of each on my phone.
First, I focused on the child. I used the common sigil of Saturn. I concentrated on allowing the darkness of Saturn to hide her. As I gained a point of singularity, three medieval ax heads began spinning around her. This combined with the darkness seemed right. He couldn't find her easily and if he did, those ax blades may do the trick.
Second, I focused on him. This time, I called on Mars. I didn't mention anything of the situation. I merely conjured withing myself an intense purpose. A spear appeared with a red shaft. I hit him with it square in the chest.
That night the ex disappeared.
My client then went to the local police to report his activities. I do not know if my statement to her was fueled by intuition or not but it was then she learned he had an existing warrant for stabbing a girlfriend.
A couple weeks later, he popped up having filed a child protection complaint which earned him an immediate court date. The day prior, she went to the courthouse and talked to the bailiffs. They said they would take care of it, if she reminded them when he came in. She did and they did. He is now in jail on that warrant.
There is still some follow through to do on this for her but it looks things are good for the moment. Though the situation could still turn if he gets out or gets deported and comes back.
Frankly, this is dangerous magick...very dangerous magick. The potential for harm here was huge. The only reason I took a chance was that doing nothing had just as much potential for harm. The best outcome was that he tried and was caught on the spot. Even that could have severely traumatized the child. Who knows what this violent nut job would have done in Mexico.
I do not recommend doing this sort of thing unless you have an expert hand. One slip and you could feel very bad for a very long time. This is not the sort of thing I ever want to do again.
Tech note: This so called tech isn't a great deal of tech. It isn't something you'd expect from someone trained in ceremonial magick. The more deeply I connect with my Greater Neschemah, the less I do CM. Focus, meditation and background knowledge seem all that is necessary right now.
I do not get a lot of this sort of work. I specialize in healing, soul readings, transformational development and that sort of thing. The few of these I have received, I referred to Jason Miller. I have no idea if they contacted him or not. This one felt like I needed to take. I know why but I am not sharing that here.
This sort of magick is very dangerous. Trying to keep a parent away from a child is serious stuff. Think of what it would take to keep you away from your child. In creating that sort of separation, you are very likely going to create a huge tragedy. So, I did nothing to create separation. I did ask her to confirm the information with others and she did.
She thought it was best to get him deported. I told her that it would be best to allow the magick to flow along the path of least resistance. Deportation may look like that path to us but other things may go on as well. For instance, he could have an outstanding warrant.
I sensed the threat was not immediately eminent. So, I took a couple of days to figure out the best set of rituals to perform. On the third day, I was on the disc golf course when I received text that he was circling the baby sitter's house. My client was thirty miles away at work.
My only tool was pictures of mother, child and husband. Fortunately, I had separate pictures of each on my phone.
First, I focused on the child. I used the common sigil of Saturn. I concentrated on allowing the darkness of Saturn to hide her. As I gained a point of singularity, three medieval ax heads began spinning around her. This combined with the darkness seemed right. He couldn't find her easily and if he did, those ax blades may do the trick.
Second, I focused on him. This time, I called on Mars. I didn't mention anything of the situation. I merely conjured withing myself an intense purpose. A spear appeared with a red shaft. I hit him with it square in the chest.
That night the ex disappeared.
My client then went to the local police to report his activities. I do not know if my statement to her was fueled by intuition or not but it was then she learned he had an existing warrant for stabbing a girlfriend.
A couple weeks later, he popped up having filed a child protection complaint which earned him an immediate court date. The day prior, she went to the courthouse and talked to the bailiffs. They said they would take care of it, if she reminded them when he came in. She did and they did. He is now in jail on that warrant.
There is still some follow through to do on this for her but it looks things are good for the moment. Though the situation could still turn if he gets out or gets deported and comes back.
Frankly, this is dangerous magick...very dangerous magick. The potential for harm here was huge. The only reason I took a chance was that doing nothing had just as much potential for harm. The best outcome was that he tried and was caught on the spot. Even that could have severely traumatized the child. Who knows what this violent nut job would have done in Mexico.
I do not recommend doing this sort of thing unless you have an expert hand. One slip and you could feel very bad for a very long time. This is not the sort of thing I ever want to do again.
Tech note: This so called tech isn't a great deal of tech. It isn't something you'd expect from someone trained in ceremonial magick. The more deeply I connect with my Greater Neschemah, the less I do CM. Focus, meditation and background knowledge seem all that is necessary right now.
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