Dream Change

I have read about how dreams help us process the day's activities. My dreams I remember never have reflected this. Since February 4th, I have had many dreams about the just past day or what was brought to mind that day regarding the next day. 

I am assuming that enough old junk has dropped away to make this possible. Maybe it is a sign of health.

Stages of Development

I came across this in my studies to be a life coach within the cleverly entitled book, Becoming a Professional Life Coach. In 1983 a fellow by the name of Robert Kegan presented a list of the stages of human development. This appears to be a good measure of the path.

The Egocentric self (stage 0-2) Birth to 12-16

The self consists of needs, interests, wishes, impulses an perceptions, but does not truly have a shared reality with others. 

Interpersonal  of Socialized Self (stage 3)

Most humans make it to this stage in which we find a role in the larger society and identify with that role. 

Independent Self (Stage 4)

Only 25% of humans in our culture successfully make this transition. The person can no longer ignore or distort the call of the soul. They realize that walking their own path may disappoint others, risk failure or violate accepted norms that seem to make the socialized self valued. They feel whole and complete.

Integral or Interindividual Self (Stage 5)

One percent of adults reach this stage. Here, the internal awareness that "I am whole and complete" of Stage 4 gives way to "I am not whole and complete...I am many selves" People here can easily make constructive judgments of themselves.  

Sacred Self (Stage 6)

This seldom if ever develops without a long-term practice. "I am not the body, nor the mind." The human identifies with the soul that is in common union with the divine. This is the birthplace of universe compassion.

(Note: this is a chopped up but often directly quoted. If a copyright holder finds this too much to post here, I will delete the post.)

No Words

Blogging has become difficult of late. Since February 4, things have changed so much. The words I type seem meaningless. I am thrilled, happy and content but writing authoritatively on any subject is trying to  make a fact out of inspiration. The words seem pompous and disconnected from what I am experiencing.

I took a few shots at the video blog entry on perfection and I was more comfortable with those results. Unfortunately, microphone results in a bit too much noise when I pause. I am obtaining a new laptop soon.

So What is Different?

On February 4, I released a damaged part of my soul. The changes are so drastic that I believe I was reborn. The odd part is that while only a little more than a fortnight as passed I feel as if I have always been this way.

The changes I am aware of at the moment are:

1.   The ever-present burning anger is gone.
2.   The need to be constantly negative is gone.
3.   I dance while doing housework.
4.   There are smiles for no reason at all.
5.   It is a joy to get out of bed in the morning.
6.   I meditate for longer periods in one sitting.
7.   I long for nothing.
8.   Progress toward new found life goals occurs daily.
9.   There is less hesitation.
10. There is no worry.
11. There is more love.
12. People at work go out of their way to compliment me.
13. An ego trip that to me is subtle but others may find to be huge.
14. An incredible sensation about my head that reminds me of the origin of the witch's hat.
15. The arrival of spirit so strong it feels like an eighteen wheeler made of feathers falling on me.
16. A desire to lose my sense of self.
17. Euphoria when I do anything that is on my purpose, more so when I throw things away.
18. I am happy.
19. The knowledge that you can do this and more.
20. Speaking with others is easy.
21. When I share, which is a preferred term over teaching, I am totally comfortable.
22. I know what peace feels like.
23. I love you.
24. A sense of sarcasm is still there but weakening.
25. A negativity is there but I call myself on it regularly. When I don't, someone else does. Yet, the          
      negativity is very soft.
26. I am still judgmental but at a greatly reduced rate.

Things that have not changed.

1.   I am lazy.
2.   I do not take care of myself.
3.   I still know that you are perfect.
4.   I still know you are divine and are G-d.
5.   The desire to continue is still intense.
6.   My woeful ignorance.

Ace of Swords is Upside Down

Many years ago, I noticed the Ace of Swords in the Thoth Tarot is upside down. Lon DuQuette's book, Understanding Aliester Crowely's Thoth Tarot is a must read for tarot readers and magicians alike. In that work he quotes Crowley on the Ace of Swords.

The pommel of the sword is in Daath, the guard extends to Chesed and Geburah; the point is in Malkuth.

A quick look at the pictures below shows the ace is drawn with the point in Keter (1) and the pommel in Malkuth (10). I have mentioned this curiousity for years but never gave the idea a lot of thought.

Today, I was meditating on Adam Kadmon, the Qabalistic concept of the primal man - the bridge between manifest man and the ultimate divine. I asked how do I pray to you [Adam Kadmon]? The crown of the ace appeared around my head. If you viewed the top of my head as the tip of the sword, the crown would be in the exact position it is on the card. Soon, I saw the sword within me as well.

The idea of the card being upside down came to mind and I toyed with it for a while but that took me out of the meditation. Returning to my original focus, I continued. Two things came to my awareness. I am not sure which arrived first.

I believe Crowley described the card as the way of return to the godhead but had the card drawn as the way of creation (i.e the force moving downward from Keter.

The swords are about separation and the process of individualization. As a rule they are painful but as Crowley said, "Love is the reason behind this ruthless analysis."

Point downward shows the godhead separating Itself into the individual human. Drawn as is, the copper pommel, represents the pure desire (Venus) to make the return journey. The crown of light being the result. That light allows us to see G-d in all that is because we can view the separate parts that sum up to the Grand Whole

The second idea came as combination of the vision and today's events. I had stated on a Facebook thread that I would not send comments to the organizers of Pantheacon as they do not seem to want feedback that isn't positive. For this I was treated to the following line: "What I find to be an interesting perspective is the divine unfolding perfection one moment and the divisive ineptitude the next."* I was also told I was an asshole and bipolar. 

Old Robert would have spoiled for a fight. This Robert simply defended himself and moved on. However, the Ace of Swords came into play there as well. I quickly cut away and dismissed the words of someone that was obviously having a bad day, was ill or tired as that fellow rarely communicates like that. Old Robert would have owned the words and beat the crap out of himself. So, I was pleased with my progress in that area but the work of the Ace did not stop there. 

Did I mention both sides of that blade are razor sharp?

I came to realize that while I am no longer rabidly argumentative and no longer anger at such things, I do comment negatively too often. I will work on resolving that.

For those of you that have asked for the Spiritual Living series of posts, this is a big hint. In order to do that work, you have to cut through the static of the universe and find what is really being communicated whether it is being said well or not. Too many people dismiss clues about themselves because things are uttered by someone they don't like, in an inept fashion or by someone that has the same issue. Doing that is not productive. One has to cut away the crassness of others, one's own perspective and one's own self-defenses to truly learn. 

The swords represent those abilities. Working with the swords can be painful but oh so worth the trauma.

*Note: The line about perfection has inspired my first video blog entitled, The Problem with Perfection, as many people think they see hypocrisy any time I dislike something. This is the result of my failure to fully share the vision of perfection. I am going to try to clarify through the spoken rather than written word. It should be up in a day or two.

The Words of VI

I wish to share with you a post on health written by my friend VI. Read his words. Read his story and, after he shares with you clues to the deeper meanings expressed, read those words again. Much wisdom is revealed.

Over the last few weeks, I have been trying to express my joy and share it with my readers and those I know personally. Instinctually, I know I have failed to convey its meaning, its peace, its love. VI has come closer than I ever could.

Don’t believe me? Then remember what it is like to be in love, to have your heart seized; captured and set free all at once. Soaring above all things, when anything is possible, and yet it returns, faithful as hawk to its Master’s wrist. Ever and always, your heart returns to the Beloved, who is the centre, the fulcrum about which your existence turns.

Yes, I am deeply in love with my soul. Peace profound.

Here is a link to the post. I will be the best thing you've read all day. Ignore the bit about myself in the beginning. There is something much more beautiful being conveyed. 

The Nature of Healing

The Disciple is called by Jesus to heal others. I have wondered about her because she believes her god to be omnipotent and all knowing. If so, why does He need her to pray for healing? Surely, she is not needed to call the sick to His attention. Of course, my vision of the perpetual unfolding of perfection is not the same as but certainly comparable to her viewpoint and therefore, I have questioned my healing abilities. Why are they needed? If all is perfect, is correction necessary?

I have reached the conclusion that healing is not the service being offered. Instead, the healing act is one of fostering unity. It teaches that two separate individuals are one. The slightest of healings can teach this. Soul readings share it at a deeper level than any of the healing I perform for body or mind because the soul structure is closer to the core of who we are.

In a similar fashion, I have contemplated justice. Vengeance (punishment) is not justice for such human judgements cannot equate the damages done by the crime and punishment. True justice is a healing act. The victim, perpetrator and those effected all receive the measure of healing needed.  With that healing, we again understand how we unified in the process and all is one.

All actions of spirit, prayer, magick, compassion, kindness are healing/unifying actions. There is but one perfection and but one right action, unifying works.