It has been my experience that when the alchemical initiatory lessons are learned the universe circles back on you and tries again. It is as if it the Universe is needs to make sure you really got it. I suppose that is true but also the lessons get subtler. Can you pass now? Can you pass now?
So, this time around. I thought I'd take it upon myself to administer a self test. In this case, it involved the lesson of the shrub and my obsession with my former group. I invited someone not involved in the original explosions but very involved with the group for dinner. We talked about a wide variety of things, including my experience with the group while intentionally (on both our parts) leaving out any specifics.
Will I fall back into obsession? Will I get angry? Will I feel the need to go back an clarify?
I've just returned. I feel relaxed but there is a feeling of a conflict. It feels as if I am concentrating on holding something in place but I am not doing it through consciously. I can simply feel the resulting tension.
So far so good. Time will tell.