Perhaps the correct word is growing pains. Either way, things were painful this weekend. I think the Gentle Soul helped me through it just by being there.
I have been very open psychically of late. It isn't working for me as I expected such things to work. I can now open and scan a room or person. I can see hot spots. This is very much akin to a blind man feeling for a wound on someone's body. Everything is normal as he slides his hand up an arm. When he gets to the wound he can feel the blood and maybe gauge the length of the cut but not the depth. I can feel the hot spot in a room or on a person. I can feel the pain it causes, even if the person is unaware. I can feel the pain a hot spot in a room throws off. With people, I cannot discern the cause of the painful energy. In a room, I sometimes feel I can.
Closing is a different story. Many times I cannot or close too late.
Being this open means that I get a raw feeling. This is very similar to what I call an sun burned aura when you work magick a bit out of your league. The psychic raw is trying. It isn't emotional. My emotions don't change. However, if I encounter something difficult or draining, the impact on my aura or etheric body does not fade quickly. Even if I sense something harsh and shut down immediately, that harshness gets imprinted. Sometimes, it can literally last all day.
Had I been in negative company during parts of this weekend, these feelings could have made life difficult. As it was, I almost left the room several times over the course of the weekend just to be alone. Everyone was great, there was just too many layers of input.
I really don't feel that makes much sense to the reader. I'm sorry for not being able to write that more clearly.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Onward to the Goal....I suppose
I believe I've mentioned something about praying to my HGA for his full and complete manifestation. I've had the contact. I just want it to be a tighter, more full, relationship. I suppose, I want it to be strong enough that any contact is complete without any ambiguity like the first meeting was.
He has given me a variation of the middle pillar that feels right. This I've only managed to do twice. Have I mentioned that the I've been VERY busy since the Prayer of Jabez?
Today, during my lunch hour, I am trying to take a cat nap in my car and I receive images of the four kerubs. I am not sure how I made the connection but that was him telling me to get my ass cracking on doing the Supreme Invoking Ritual of the Pentagram. Joy...with what time?
Diet
After watching the documentary Megan pointed out, I have started to eat a little bit more raw food and have now cut out aspartame. I must say I feel a bit better. We will see.
He has given me a variation of the middle pillar that feels right. This I've only managed to do twice. Have I mentioned that the I've been VERY busy since the Prayer of Jabez?
Today, during my lunch hour, I am trying to take a cat nap in my car and I receive images of the four kerubs. I am not sure how I made the connection but that was him telling me to get my ass cracking on doing the Supreme Invoking Ritual of the Pentagram. Joy...with what time?
Diet
After watching the documentary Megan pointed out, I have started to eat a little bit more raw food and have now cut out aspartame. I must say I feel a bit better. We will see.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Lessons Relearned with the LBRP
Last weekend, I did a cleansing of a bedroom. Actually, it was a converted garage. A teen or young woman had prostituted herself and taken drugs there. There was considerable psychic yuck about.
The really blog worthy part was that she left a fractured part of herself behind. It was very 'dirty'. The color of it was a deep murky brown. I told this thing that I was going to banish but that it could return. I wasn't trying to harm it. I merely wanted to get rid of the yuck and said that it may make her more comfortable too.
I did the LBRP, BRH and then hit the area with holy water and fire in the form of a sage stick. This is not exactly blog worthy material. However, I remembered this is more than just a rote ritual. I took enough time to be worshipful, deliberately respectful and communicated with the angels. I asked them to do specific things. I was really pleased with the results in the moment. I could so FEEL their movements and energies/powers.
The next day, I saw her again, she was white! She was remembering that she wasn't a worthless soul. I think that fractured part was part of her that tended to be more 'holy' but it had devalued itself. I am not sure she will be there when next I visit.
The really blog worthy part was that she left a fractured part of herself behind. It was very 'dirty'. The color of it was a deep murky brown. I told this thing that I was going to banish but that it could return. I wasn't trying to harm it. I merely wanted to get rid of the yuck and said that it may make her more comfortable too.
I did the LBRP, BRH and then hit the area with holy water and fire in the form of a sage stick. This is not exactly blog worthy material. However, I remembered this is more than just a rote ritual. I took enough time to be worshipful, deliberately respectful and communicated with the angels. I asked them to do specific things. I was really pleased with the results in the moment. I could so FEEL their movements and energies/powers.
The next day, I saw her again, she was white! She was remembering that she wasn't a worthless soul. I think that fractured part was part of her that tended to be more 'holy' but it had devalued itself. I am not sure she will be there when next I visit.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
1,000th Post! And a Thanks to Megan
The previous post was my 1,000th to this space. Thanks to those that have offered advice over the years. I also want to thank those that send the occasional note saying that I have assisted with their work, confirmed something they had done or inspired them to try something. I just love it when that happens.
I would also like to thank long time reader Megan for recommending the documentary Food Matters. I watched that on Netflix. I am slowly incorporating more raw foods into my diet. My body is less distracting and digestion more comfortable. Given the distraction of all the pain I am normally in, this incremental relief is very noticable and welcome.
I would also like to thank long time reader Megan for recommending the documentary Food Matters. I watched that on Netflix. I am slowly incorporating more raw foods into my diet. My body is less distracting and digestion more comfortable. Given the distraction of all the pain I am normally in, this incremental relief is very noticable and welcome.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
American Goetia: The Bill of Rights
I have been most amused in scanning the blogosphere. Apparently, the famous lodge that had some difficulty has inspired some former or current members to begin developing a Bill of Rights for those in esoteric groups. I will not discuss my views on that matter specifically. I have also noticed a Pagan Bill of Rights trying to make its rounds on Face Book. I look at these and figure that I tapped into an emerging stream of thought well in advance.
Such a Bill of Rights is integral to the American Goetia (tm) system I am developing. The difference is that it has nothing to do with group structure. Practitioners are required to develop their own bill of rights. This document, expresses things so fundamental to the nature of the practitioner, that reciting or declaring them begins to build the authority necessary to do this sort of work. These have to be deeply held core principals essential to the integrity of the practitioner's soul manifestation in this lifetime as far as s/he is capable of understanding it in the moment. Obviously, any given set of declarations can be amended or redacted over time. This is no small work. Serious soul searching is required. Those who have not done this work, may find the practice of American Goetia (tm) very problematic.
I did note that Crowley, in Liber Oz, may have had the same sort of idea. I am working on my own such bill now and so are my partners. At the moment, I am patterning my ideas on my own thoughts plus these works. I expect the list to expand over time but the eventual document to be rather short and concise.
Such a Bill of Rights is integral to the American Goetia (tm) system I am developing. The difference is that it has nothing to do with group structure. Practitioners are required to develop their own bill of rights. This document, expresses things so fundamental to the nature of the practitioner, that reciting or declaring them begins to build the authority necessary to do this sort of work. These have to be deeply held core principals essential to the integrity of the practitioner's soul manifestation in this lifetime as far as s/he is capable of understanding it in the moment. Obviously, any given set of declarations can be amended or redacted over time. This is no small work. Serious soul searching is required. Those who have not done this work, may find the practice of American Goetia (tm) very problematic.
I did note that Crowley, in Liber Oz, may have had the same sort of idea. I am working on my own such bill now and so are my partners. At the moment, I am patterning my ideas on my own thoughts plus these works. I expect the list to expand over time but the eventual document to be rather short and concise.
- Crowley's Liber OZ
- The United States Bill of Rights
- An Early Document in US History about Religious Tolerance and Freedom. This was enacted in North or South Carolina about the time of the Revolution. I am tracking it down.
- Franklin Delano Roosevelt's Four Freedoms.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Follow-Up to Tarot Magick Post
Our UK friend asked some follow-up questions to yesterday's post.
UK Friend, "...just a clarifying point though, when you talk about talking your words through the cards, you could adapt it to a physical situation as well, for example I think the one in your previous post talked about getting organised and doing a lot more using the Ace of Pentacles, would you just visualise the card whilst you go about cleaning the house, or for example visualising the Ace of Swords whilst you were revising to gain clarity of mind for example?
Robert: Yes, that is exactly correct.
UK Friend, "Also, one more question (I hope you don't mind) but you talk about gaining skills before implementing these things, is it possible to try doing these methods with the cards as you work on focuisng and ritual skills, or do you need to be at a certain level before it is possible?"
Robert: I have always been 100% in favor of new magicians doing magick that impacts themselves personally and has very little (preferably no) direct impact on others. Your examples are classic ideas of this. Especially, if you really have a firm understanding of organization, to use your example specifically. In fact, I'd meditate and visualize the Ace of Pents in front of me. Then, let the Ace cover myself, which is a more difficult visualization. During this visualization, pray for an understanding of organization. This will likely result in deeper insights into how to organize yourself in a way that is best pleasing or useful to your personality. It may even reveal why you are unorganized or a host of other things. Then yes, use that understanding but express it only in a word "Organize," as you use the card as you suggested.
To clarify, I am dead set against new magicians doing magick that impacts others at all. I remember reading when I was young, "So called doing good for others should be eschewed for the time being." I don't remember who wrote that but I do remember thinking, "Then what good is magick?" Now, I understand.
Young magicians doing magick for others, even altruistically, are usually coming from a place of inflated ego, a gross misunderstanding of the self, or massive control issues. None of those things is conducive to further progress on the path. Even the blow-ups that normally occur from such things tend to be less instructive. Most likely because the starting point was an exercise in ego inflation. How things start can really impact the outcome.
Finally, magick is a tricky thing to learn to use wisely. No one with a shred of human compassion and decency will advocate doing so while being an active detriment to others. To be fair, those that are about to disagree with that statement will have a much different definition of "active detriment."
To answer the very end of that question, "...or do you need to be at a certain level before it is possible?"
Mileage varies on this. This is a very good way of understanding your basic abilities with this technique. Try it and find out!
UK Friend, "...just a clarifying point though, when you talk about talking your words through the cards, you could adapt it to a physical situation as well, for example I think the one in your previous post talked about getting organised and doing a lot more using the Ace of Pentacles, would you just visualise the card whilst you go about cleaning the house, or for example visualising the Ace of Swords whilst you were revising to gain clarity of mind for example?
Robert: Yes, that is exactly correct.
UK Friend, "Also, one more question (I hope you don't mind) but you talk about gaining skills before implementing these things, is it possible to try doing these methods with the cards as you work on focuisng and ritual skills, or do you need to be at a certain level before it is possible?"
Robert: I have always been 100% in favor of new magicians doing magick that impacts themselves personally and has very little (preferably no) direct impact on others. Your examples are classic ideas of this. Especially, if you really have a firm understanding of organization, to use your example specifically. In fact, I'd meditate and visualize the Ace of Pents in front of me. Then, let the Ace cover myself, which is a more difficult visualization. During this visualization, pray for an understanding of organization. This will likely result in deeper insights into how to organize yourself in a way that is best pleasing or useful to your personality. It may even reveal why you are unorganized or a host of other things. Then yes, use that understanding but express it only in a word "Organize," as you use the card as you suggested.
To clarify, I am dead set against new magicians doing magick that impacts others at all. I remember reading when I was young, "So called doing good for others should be eschewed for the time being." I don't remember who wrote that but I do remember thinking, "Then what good is magick?" Now, I understand.
Young magicians doing magick for others, even altruistically, are usually coming from a place of inflated ego, a gross misunderstanding of the self, or massive control issues. None of those things is conducive to further progress on the path. Even the blow-ups that normally occur from such things tend to be less instructive. Most likely because the starting point was an exercise in ego inflation. How things start can really impact the outcome.
Finally, magick is a tricky thing to learn to use wisely. No one with a shred of human compassion and decency will advocate doing so while being an active detriment to others. To be fair, those that are about to disagree with that statement will have a much different definition of "active detriment."
To answer the very end of that question, "...or do you need to be at a certain level before it is possible?"
Mileage varies on this. This is a very good way of understanding your basic abilities with this technique. Try it and find out!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Tarot Magick Question
I received a nice little note from a reader that hails from the UK. She wrote, "I have recently been going through your back posts and noticed you mentioning working with the tarot cards (particularly the Ace of Pentacles) to affect your day to day life, and I was wondering how you went about that? Was there some sort of meditation or visulisation or a path working of sorts?" While I am not sure of the post she is referring to, I will give this a shot.
This is one of those questions that could get a very basic answer. Tonight, I don't feel like giving a basic answer.
In order to perform this sort of thing, I needed to become proficient at a few skills.
Skill One: Debullshitification
From very early on, I could see and hear thing on the astral. However, my early group beat all confidence in that skill out of me. They were both right and wrong. They were right in that what I was hearing was often, but not always, flattery. They were right in that I was not very good at discerning the meaning of what was said. For instance, I'd take metaphor literally. They were wrong in that I was actually reaching the lower astral. My engagements were not delusional but they were approached with a lack of discernment.
So, overtime, I learned to perform a bullshitectomy. Slowly, I built myself up so that I'd attract spirits of a higher order and took what they said with a grain of salt. I also learned to keep my mouth shut about messages that I knew others would disagree with. I simply let the correctness or incorrectness make itself apparent over time.
Skill Two: Reverse ADD
I cannot speak for our UK friends but your modern American has the attention span of your average house fly. This is doubly true when you're communicating with the better parts of yourself in a meditation or magickal working. One has to be able to stay in contact with whatever it is you are working with.
I developed this longevity through meditation and energy work. The latter took the form of a lot of middle pillar exercises.
Skill Three: Getting it Rite
Developing ritual skills is paramount for the magician. I don't care if you can write them. Sooner or later that will come. However, you must know how to perform a ritual in whatever area you're working in. Tripping over your own robes, especially while sitting down, is not only embarrassing but it gets you out of the proper mind set. Know what you are supposed to be doing. Know each step. Have it fully memorized and if that isn't possible, have things so organized that finding what you need isn't a distraction.
Skill Four: Match Game
Read more than one book on topic with your goal. These books should be written by people of the same general perspective. I tend to stick with folks that use the qabala. The trick is to find specific sub-topics and compare each author. You can find patterns that give you huge clues to understanding. Read this stuff side by side. Compare their exact words. Compare what they hint at and ask. Reading between the lines is a hugely underrated skill.
Skill Five: What You See is What You Get (WYSIWYG)
Learn proper visualization techniques. If you can't close your eyes and see your card, you'll have a harder time doing this.
Skill Six: Get Way Down Low
Come up with one idea that exemplifies the card you're working with. One idea. Be able to state this idea in one or two words. It doesn't matter if it is more complicated than that. If it is, you don't know it well enough yet but no matter. Hang on to one idea.
Skill Seven: Nike
Just do it! Find a situation in your life where you need that one idea to manifest. While you're amongst people that can make it happen or whose minds you need to convince visualize the card between you and them. Speak so your words go through the card. See them doing so. Let their words flow through the card as well.
Magick is easy.
Edit: There was a follow-up to this post: Follow-up to Tarot Magick
This is one of those questions that could get a very basic answer. Tonight, I don't feel like giving a basic answer.
In order to perform this sort of thing, I needed to become proficient at a few skills.
Skill One: Debullshitification
From very early on, I could see and hear thing on the astral. However, my early group beat all confidence in that skill out of me. They were both right and wrong. They were right in that what I was hearing was often, but not always, flattery. They were right in that I was not very good at discerning the meaning of what was said. For instance, I'd take metaphor literally. They were wrong in that I was actually reaching the lower astral. My engagements were not delusional but they were approached with a lack of discernment.
So, overtime, I learned to perform a bullshitectomy. Slowly, I built myself up so that I'd attract spirits of a higher order and took what they said with a grain of salt. I also learned to keep my mouth shut about messages that I knew others would disagree with. I simply let the correctness or incorrectness make itself apparent over time.
Skill Two: Reverse ADD
I cannot speak for our UK friends but your modern American has the attention span of your average house fly. This is doubly true when you're communicating with the better parts of yourself in a meditation or magickal working. One has to be able to stay in contact with whatever it is you are working with.
I developed this longevity through meditation and energy work. The latter took the form of a lot of middle pillar exercises.
Skill Three: Getting it Rite
Developing ritual skills is paramount for the magician. I don't care if you can write them. Sooner or later that will come. However, you must know how to perform a ritual in whatever area you're working in. Tripping over your own robes, especially while sitting down, is not only embarrassing but it gets you out of the proper mind set. Know what you are supposed to be doing. Know each step. Have it fully memorized and if that isn't possible, have things so organized that finding what you need isn't a distraction.
Skill Four: Match Game
Read more than one book on topic with your goal. These books should be written by people of the same general perspective. I tend to stick with folks that use the qabala. The trick is to find specific sub-topics and compare each author. You can find patterns that give you huge clues to understanding. Read this stuff side by side. Compare their exact words. Compare what they hint at and ask. Reading between the lines is a hugely underrated skill.
Skill Five: What You See is What You Get (WYSIWYG)
Learn proper visualization techniques. If you can't close your eyes and see your card, you'll have a harder time doing this.
Skill Six: Get Way Down Low
Come up with one idea that exemplifies the card you're working with. One idea. Be able to state this idea in one or two words. It doesn't matter if it is more complicated than that. If it is, you don't know it well enough yet but no matter. Hang on to one idea.
Skill Seven: Nike
Just do it! Find a situation in your life where you need that one idea to manifest. While you're amongst people that can make it happen or whose minds you need to convince visualize the card between you and them. Speak so your words go through the card. See them doing so. Let their words flow through the card as well.
Magick is easy.
Edit: There was a follow-up to this post: Follow-up to Tarot Magick
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