Of late, I have been struggling with my PTSD issues. They have not been horrific as they have been in the past but sleep is difficult, anger arises and I am a bit more confrontational. Overall, the intensity level is about 25% of what it was for a decade. So, at my worst, I am much improved. I think part of this stemmed from the path working I did earlier this winter and the triangle ritual. For me, that rite is intense. Given that I am a fiery guy and it is a fire-based ritual, it is only natural it will cause some issues for me.
This morning, I performed the rite and invoked water within the form. This was interesting. I received confirmation of plans for a career change that I have been 'told' will satisfy an emotional and spiritual need. I was even given some instruction on how to do magick to aid those plans coming to fruition. Towards the end of the meditation period, which only lasted a few minutes, I was given a method to make the rite more effective by adding an angelic force at a certain location within the temple space.
Can you say KABOOM?
A beautiful world tree formed beneath me and rose through me, its branches reaching to the sky--totally awesome.
I left the work space feeling very energized by fire. This I do not need in my given state but as I write I am being inundated by water. This is peaceful and cool.
For my next trick, I will create a standard circle of water and then do the triangle rite within that.
Edit: This is what I meant by my post on not holding yourself to a perfect standard. Things ebb and flow but continually improve. You can't take any set back as invalidation of yourself or your work.