Saturday, June 21, 2008

Pantacles and the Homeless

Today, I painted my earth pentacle a bit after doing some serious sanding and painting yesterday. I choose a big heavy piece of oak. Mistake! The process involves sanding a disk until it is baby butt smooth and adding coat after coat of Jesso until the baby butt surface is whiter than white. Then you add the color and names etc. I've worked on this thing off and on for over two years. I am still sanding and Jessoing. I will win, eventually.

I went for a walk and encountered a man with mental issues compounded by raging alchoholism. I see him at the corner liquor store a lot. He spends a lot of time talking to himself and radiating pain. He is harmless I suppose. He asked for a dollar. I gave it to him gladly.

Over the years, I've given lots of money to pan handlers. Mostly because I felt a bit guilty that they had so little. It doesn't matter that they have so little because they are druggies or drunks or crazy. I have always forked over my change. But always, with a tinge of guilt. This time, I was happy to give the man a dollar. Odd. Was that Bune? Since calling him I have become more appreciative of what I have. This is not a sensation of coveting what I have or fear of loosing it but truly grateful.

That isn't a bad feeling. If Bune taught me that, good for him! If not, well, good for whatever did.

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